Bill Nye and Boomerang: Or, The Tale of a Meek-Eyed Mule, and Some Other Literary GemsNye, Bill
General
Bill Nye and Boomerang: Or, The Tale of a Meek-Eyed Mule, and Some Other Literary Gems
Nye, Bill
American wit and humor
I asked the freckled youth what I could do for him, and he said that
there was a man at the foot of the stairs who wished to see me. I asked
him then why in the name of a great republic and a free people he didn't
see me. Then I told the boy that there was no admission fee; that it was
the regular afternoon matinee, and it was a free show.
The frank and manly little feilow then came forward and told me that the
man was blind.
It was not intended as a joke. It was a horrible reality, and pretty
soon a man into whose sightless orbs the cheerful light of day had not
entered for many years came up the stairs and into the office.
I said: "Ah, sir, I see that you are a poor, blind man. You cannot see
the green grass and waving trees. While others see the pleasant fields
and lovely landscape you wander on year after year in the hopeless
gloom. Poor man. Do you not at times yearn for immortality and pine to
be among the angels where the light of a glorious eternity will enter
upon your sightless vision like a beautiful dream?"
This was a little sentiment that I had committed to memory, being an
extract from the _Youth's Companion_.
He wiped away three or four scalding tears with his sleeve and said that
he did. He was getting means, he said, to enable him to go to New York,
where he was going to have his eyes taken out and refilled. He also
intended to have the cornea filed down and a new crystal put in.
I asked him how much he thought it would cost. He said he thought it
could be arranged so that $1,000 would pay the bill. At first I started
to draw a check for that amount, and then I thought I would try him with
a dollar first.
He took the dollar and walked sadly away.
It always makes me feel bad when I see a fellow creature who is doomed
with uncertain steps and sightless eyes to tread his weary way through
life, and I cannot be happy when I know that such misery is abroad in
the land. I thought how much I had to be thankful for, how fortunate I
had been to have all my senses and my bright and beautiful intellect,
that I wouldn't take $400 for.
Then I wandered out to a saloon on A street to get a cigar. The blind
man was there. He had just poured out about six fingers of Jamaica rum
and was setting them up for the boys. I thought I would stand in with
the arrangement, so I leaned up against the bar in very classic style
and took two cigars at twenty-five cents apiece.
When he came to pay for the goods he shoved out the dollar I gave him,
which I recognized, because it was a pewter dollar, and a very inferior
pewter dollar at that.
The bartender kicked like a roan cow, and while the excitement was
at its height I stole away to where I could be alone with my surging
thoughts.
The blind man is still in town, but he is not succeeding very well.
Unfortunately he has told several large openfaced lies and the feeling
of pity for him has petered out, if I may be allowed that expression.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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