Bill Nye and Boomerang: Or, The Tale of a Meek-Eyed Mule, and Some Other Literary GemsNye, Bill
General
Bill Nye and Boomerang: Or, The Tale of a Meek-Eyed Mule, and Some Other Literary Gems
Nye, Bill
American wit and humor
"_Dear Sir_: I take great pleasure in bearing testimony to the efficacy
of woman's suffrage. It is indeed a boon to thousands. I was troubled
in the east beyond measure with an ingrowing nail on the most extensive
toe. It caused me great pain and annoyance. I was compelled to do my
work wearing an old gum overshoe of my husband's. Since using woman's
suffrage only a few months, my toe is entirely well, and I now wear my
husband's fine boots with perfect ease. As a remedy for ingrowing nails
I can safely recommend the woman's suffrage.
"Sassafras Oleson."
Miner's Delight, Jan 23, 1880.
"_Deer Sur_: Two year ago mi waife fell down into a nold sellar and
droav her varyloid through the Sarah bellum. I thot she was a Gonner. I
woz then livin' in the sou west potion of Injeanny. I moved to where i
now am leaving sevral onsettled accounts where i lived. But i wood do
almost anything to recover mi waifs helth. She tried Woman's Suffrins
and can now lick me with 1 hand tied behind hur. i o everything to the
free yuse of the femail ballot. So good bi. at Present
"Union Forever McGilligin."
Rawhide, Feb. 2, 1880.
"_Dear Sir_: I came to Wyoming one year ago to-day. At that time I only
weighed 153 pounds and felt all the time as though I might die. I was a
walking skeleton. Coyotes followed me when I went away from the house.
"My husband told me to try Woman's Suffrage. I did so. I have now run up
to my old weight of 213 pounds, and I feel that with the proper care and
rest, and rich wholesome diet, I mav be spared to my husband and family
till next spring.
"I am now joyful and happy. I go about my work all day singing Old Zip
Coon and other plaintive melodies. After using Woman's Suffrage two days
I sat up in a rocking chair and ate one and three-fourths mince pies.
Then I worried down a sugar-cured ham and have been gaining ever since.
"Ah! it is a pleasant thing to come back to life and its joys again.
"Yours truly, Ethel Lillian Kersikes."
PORTUGUESE WITHOUT A MASTER.
|I am spending my leisure moments these days studying the Portuguese
language.
It is not very generally used, it is true, but I might meet a Portuguese
some day who wanted to hold a conversation with me very much, and I
would feel more at ease if I could speak the language with elegance and
precision.
I am working at the task silently and earnestly without a master, and
I am sometimes a little mystified by the startling and original
exhibitions of imported syntax and etymology as shown in the English
translations given in the book which I am studying. It is a kind of
Portuguese primer, designed and constructed by Jose De Fonseca and Pedro
Carolino, and although the Portuguese part of it seems to be all right,
I am at times a little annoyed at the novel arrangement of the English
translations.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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