I reached the house, and the old man who answered my ring at the
office entrance, was speechless from tears. Though usually hard as
iron, he sobbed as if his heart would break. I asked to speak with
Barbara--with my housekeeper. He told me I could not--that she was
"busy laying out the body." I was answered. That dreadful word told me
all--I had no more questions to ask. I cared not _who_ survived, or
what became of the survivors. And as I turned sickening away, to bend
my steps homewards, I remember wondering how that fair spring morning
could shine so bright and auspiciously, when _she_ was gone from us.
It seemed to triumph in our loss! Alas! it shone to welcome a new
angel to the kingdom of our Father who is in heaven!
Suddenly it struck me, that I, too, had a duty to perform. In that
scanty household there was no one to take thought of the common forms
of life; so I hastened to the rectory, to suggest to our good pastor a
visit of consolation to the house of mourning, and acquaint his
sisters with its forlorn condition. Like myself, they began
exclaiming, "Alas! alas! It was but the other day that"----reverting
to all the acts of charity and girlish graces of that dear departed
Mary Stanley, who had been among us as the shadow of a dream.
Before I left the rectory, Dr Whittingham had issued his orders; and
lo! as I proceeded homewards, with a heavy step and a heavier heart,
the sound of the passing bell from Lexley church pursued me with its
measured toll, till I could scarcely refrain from sitting me down by
the wayside, and weeping my very soul away.
On reaching the lane I have so often described as skirting the gardens
of the old Hall, I noticed, through the palisades, a person, probably
one of the gardeners, sauntering along Lady Robert's favourite
yew-walk. No! on a nearer approach, I saw, and almost shuddered to
see, that it was General Stanley himself (who, I fancied, had
accompanied his son-in-law to town) taking an early walk, to enjoy the
sweetness of that delicious morning.
As I drew nearer, I averted my head. At that moment I had not courage
to look him in the face. I could scarcely suppose him ignorant of what
had occurred; and, if aware of the sad event, his obduracy was unmanly
to a degree that filled me with disgust. But just as I came opposite
the iron gates, he hailed me by name--more familiarly and courteously
than he was wont--to ask whether I came from the village, and for
_whose_ death they were tolling?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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