Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Vol 58, No. 357, July 1845Various
History
Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Vol 58, No. 357, July 1845
Various
England -- Periodicals; Scotland -- Periodicals
The dreaded day of trial arrived. But we must revert to her sad
meditations, and wild irresolute thoughts, while shut up by the
storm-cloud, and alone, in the mountain house. Doating passion, pain of
heart, terrible suggestions of despair, kept altering her countenance as
she leaned against the mouldering door-post, imprisoned by the black
mists that prevented her safely leaving the hovel. A sudden, dire,
revolution in her religious impressions was wrought, or rather
completed, in that dismal scene. David had more than once wrung her very
soul by dark hints of self-destruction in the event of her ever
forsaking him. He had thus been led into discussions on suicide, and had
even argued for the moral right of man to end his own being under
circumstances. Persuasion hangs on the lips of those we love. What she
would have rejected as impious, from some immoral man, in dispute, sank
deep into her soul, emanating from a heart she loved, through lips that,
to her, seemed formed for eloquence as much as love to make its throne.
Wild and tragical modes of reconciling her two furious, fighting,
irreconcilable wishes--that of saving her father--that of blessing her
lover--began to take terrible form and reality in her mind, as the wind
howled, the ruinous house shook, and its timbers groaned, and the
blackness of the sky, as the storm increased, deepened the lurid hue of
the foul and turbulent fog, (for such the mountain cloud thus in contact
with her eyes appeared.) The world, as it were, already left behind, or
rather below, the elements alone warring round her, her high-wrought
imagination began to regard life and death, and the world itself, as
things no longer appertaining to her, except as a passive instrument
toward one great object, the preservation of her father's freedom, and,
if it _were_ possible, also of her own inviolate person--that person
which she had, indeed, most solemnly vowed to one alone, David the
Telynwr. Not _to_ him--for her innate delicacy rendered such vows
repugnant to her; but alone, by the moon or stars, by the cataract, and
in the lonely lanes and woods, she had vowed herself to one alone--had
dedicated her virgin beauty (in the spirit of those romances she had
fatally devoured) to her "night-harper" with as true devotion as ever
did white vestal, at the end of her noviciate, devote herself alive and
dead to the one God. Instilled by the touching tone, the wild pathos,
the swimming eye of a wayward passionate character, weak, yet bold, of
whom she knew almost nothing, this devoted girl yielded up her better
reason to his rash innovations in morals, his examples of suicidal
heroes, and even _moralists_, among the ancients; and in the wild
height, alone, among the clouds, she almost wrought up her fond
agonizing soul to a terrible part--the accomplishing her father's
preservation, _on her wedding-day_, through the influence she might
naturally expect to obtain in such a season, and that done, make her
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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