Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Vol. 63, No. 388, February 1848Various
History
Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Vol. 63, No. 388, February 1848
Various
England -- Periodicals; Scotland -- Periodicals
“Of course, I did not dream of renewing an application thus cruelly
repulsed, but resolved to rely on myself alone, and to find some
occupation, however humble, sufficient for my subsistence. I had no
idea, until I tried, of the immense difficulty of procuring such
occupation. Master of no trade or handicraft, I knew not which way to
turn, or what species of employment to seek. I was a good swordsman, and
once I had a vague notion of teaching fencing; but even had I had the
means to establish myself, the profession was already over-stocked; and
not a regiment of the Paris garrison but could turn out a score of
_prévôts_ to button me six times for my once. I could ride, which
qualified me for a postilion, and had sufficient knowledge of billiards
to aspire to the honourable post of a marker; but even to such
offices—could I have stooped to compete for them—I should have been held
ineligible without certificates of character. And to whom was I to apply
for these? To my gay acquaintances of the Café de Paris? To the
obsequious banker to whom I had come handsomely accredited, and who had
given me a sumptuous dinner in his hotel of the Rue Bergère? To the
noble and fashionable families to whom I had brought letters of
recommendation, and whom I had neglected after a single visit? To which
of these should I apply for a character as groom? And how was I to exist
without condescending to some such menial office? To aught better,
gentleman though I was, I had no qualifications entitling me to aspire.
It was a sharp, but wholesome, lesson to my vanity and pride, to find
myself, so soon as deprived of my factitious advantage of inherited
wealth, less able to provide for my commonest wants than the
fustian-coated mechanic and hob-nailed labourer, whom I had been wont to
splash with my carriage-wheel and despise as an inferior race of beings.
Bitter were my reflections, great was my perplexity, during the month
succeeding my sudden change of fortune. I passed whole days lying upon
the bed in my melancholy lodging, or leaning out of the window, which
looked over a dreary range of roofs, ruminating my forlorn position, and
endeavouring, but in vain, to find a remedy. This was urgent; but no
cudgelling of my brain suggested one, and at last I saw myself on the
brink of destitution. A score of five-franc pieces had constituted my
whole fortune after satisfying my former extortionate landlord. These
were nearly gone, and I knew not how to obtain another shilling; for my
kit was reduced to linen and the most indispensable necessaries. I now
learned upon how little a man may live, and even thrive and be healthy.
During that month, I contrived to keep my expenses of food and lodging
within two francs a-day, making the whole month’s expenditure
considerably less than I had commonly thrown away on an epicurean
breakfast or dinner. And I was all the better for the coarse regimen to
which I thus suddenly found myself reduced. Harassed in mind though I
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account