“Well then, gentlemen,” he said, “we will commence with this robbery affair, though it is the last, as far as I know, in point of date.” And, taking a newspaper from his pocket, he showed us the confession of a criminal convicted of highway robbery at the assizes of a neighbouring county, which stated that he (the convict) was the man who had robbed the old farmer after the cattle-market at Mudford. “So you see, gentlemen,” the Doctor said, “I am innocent of that crime at all events, and this paper has come to me most opportunely, so that I might convince you. And now for something else. I know well enough that there have been reports of a very black character in circulation about me; and among the rest, that I, a bachelor, have a lady closely shut up in this house. Is it not so?” We all said that it was so, and that we should like to have it explained. “Then, gentlemen,” said he, “please to understand that the lady in question is my wife, and that she was so before I came to Mudford.” “Then, sir,” we all exclaimed with one voice, “how do you account for your conduct to Miss Playfair?” “Wait a moment, gentlemen,” he said; “to explain that matter I must fetch something from the next room. I will be back again directly.” He left the room, and we gazed on each other with looks of blank astonishment; but before we could say a word, he returned and resumed his seat. Finding that he did not speak for some time, we began to grow impatient, and asked him for his promised explanation. “Explanation?” said he, as if he had forgotten all about it. “What explanation, pray?” “Why, your explanation about Miss Playfair!” “Gentlemen,” he said, in the coolest manner possible, “I have nothing to say about Miss Playfair, except that she is a very charming and estimable young lady, and that I hope soon to make her my wife.” “Your wife!” we exclaimed. “Why, you have a wife already in this very house!” He looked from one to the other with an appearance of the greatest bewilderment; and then said, with the utmost coolness, “O dear, no, gentlemen! You are mistaken, I assure you. I have no wife, and never had such a thing in my life.” “Why, you told us but a minute since that the woman who has been in this house for we don’t know how long was your wife!” “I beg your pardon,” he replied. “I never said anything of the sort. I have no wife, and never had one since I was born!” We all started to our feet, exclaiming, “This is unbearable; we didn’t come here to be insulted!” and were about to leave the room and the house; but with a merry laugh the Doctor exclaimed— “Stop, gentlemen! Stop a moment, I pray; and excuse my joking with you. The farce has lasted long enough.” And he touched the bell. Immediately the door opened, and the New Doctor entered!