"Sir! sir!" cried voice at the door, "they be come." I hurried out; my servant was armed with the poker, I seized the hall tongs as I passed through; and on the lawn, in the coolest possible manner, were about half a dozen fellows smoking their cigars, and occasionally looking through a bright brass instrument upon a three-legged stand, and noting down the result with the greatest nonchalance. "Oho!" I cried, and rushed at the intruders, "run for the people in the barn, Thomas. Who are you, you infernal interloping vagabonds?" "Engineers of the Episcopal and Universal Railway Company, sir, and we will trouble you to stand out of the way," said a tall blackguard, scarcely deigning to look at me. "Oh, you are, are you? Just wait a minute till my men come up, and I'll have you and your railway ducked in the horsepond." "Don't interrupt us, old man," replied the scientific ruffian; "if we do any damage, charge it to the Company--we have seventy-five thousand shares, and can afford to pay any claims." "Here!" I cried to the men, "catch that long villain with the dwarf telescope and take him into the house; if I don't get him six weeks of the treadmill my name is not Tom Sneezum." The man made a stout resistance, but at last was overpowered, and carried into the hall. I helped to repel the others, and as they were tolerably civil, now that the ringleader was gone, I contented myself with walking them to the very end of my boundaries, and gave them notice, that if they ventured to return, I would treat them exactly as I had done their chief. This whole business did not take up more than an hour; and before going home, I walked across to Major Slowtops, the nearest magistrate, and luckily found him at home. He promised to trounce the fellow handsomely when I brought him; and telling him I would be back with the culprit and the witnesses in half an hour, I returned in no little triumph to Goslingbury. "Where is the vagabond?" I exclaimed, when I got into the house. "He's been gone this hour, sir," said Thomas, hardly able to keep in a laugh. "Gone! who let him go?" "Why, he ordered the carriage, sir, and him and Miss Martha is off for London." "Are you mad, Thomas?--what is it you're speaking of? Where is the rascally leveller of the railway?" "Lor', sir--don't you know? It was only Mr William at one of his tricks. The moment he took off the spectacles we all knew him, and Miss Martha seemed so pleased"-- "Did she?" "Oh, yes! and Mr William--but they say he's Captain Morgan now--laughed so. It was certainly a rare good surprise--wasn't it, sir?" I rushed into my study. "Let her go!" I said, "the false, deceitful Hottentot, or Hindoo, or whatever she is; she's as black as my hat, and a disgrace to my old uncle." So I stood very quietly, brooding over my misfortune--if a misfortune it was--and revenging myself by tearing into a million pieces the beginning and the end of my romantic novel. * * * * *