"We go slap across it in the twinkling of a bedpost, by a handsome viaduct of thirty arches on the skew principle," said Stagman. "Lo, you now!" said Scapegrace, marvelling--"Surely, however, the road is rugged and hilly?" "Thou wouldst say, the gradients are bad; not so, there is none worse than one in the hundred--quite as good as the Caledonian." "I know not that road," said Scrapegrace. "So much the better for thee," answered Stagman gravely. "But, neighbour, how do you contrive to carry your road through other men's grounds?" said Scapegrace. "We promise to share the profits with them," said Stagman, "and so keep them quiet; or put them on the Provisional Committee, with power to audit their own accounts. Sometimes, no doubt, we are put to our shifts for a time, as was the case with Squire Despair of Doubting Castle, who opposed us on the standing orders, and threatened to throw us out in committee; but, as it ended in our buying Doubting Castle at his own price, and paying him handsomely for intersectional damage besides, he soon withdrew his opposition, and is now an active promoter of the line. Indeed, I know not any one who can give us further trouble, except it be old Pope, who says the road will ruin his villa, and be the death of any of his bulls that get upon the line; but as we know that he is as poor as a church rat, and will never show face in the committee, we mind him not, and, in truth, I have no doubt the committee will find the preamble proved." "Find what?" enquired Scapegrace;--"methinks, Stagman, thou dealest in strange words, and usest a jargon hard to be understood of men." "Find the preamble proved," answered Stagman; "which means we shall be empowered to make the road." "I suppose then, neighbour," said Scapegrace, "there will be great resort of travellers to this same CENT-PER-CENT, and much toll levied thereat?" "The passenger traffic, the prospectus says, will be enormous," answered Stagman; "and the minerals along the line are of course inexhaustible." "But tell me, neighbour, is this same mode of travel as pleasant for the wayfarers as thou sayest?" "Exceedingly pleasant for the survivors," answered Stagman. "Doubtless it sometimes happens that a carriage or two will run over a precipice, or the down-train from Little-go may run into the up-train from Hap-hazard, whereby some dozen lives may go amissing; but such accidents are unavoidable, and it is satisfactory to know that on these occasions there never yet has been the slightest blame imputable to any one concerned--the stoker being invariably a most respectable man, and the utmost attention paid to the signals." "Nay now, neighbour Stagman," said Scapegrace; "all this is mighty comfortable and encouraging, and I long much to have share with thee in this same business."