"Where the play ends in the triumph of the wittiest rogue. My friend hee has no chance!" "'Praise from Sir Hubert Stanley,' hem--yes--Hal Peacock maybe witty, but he is no rogue." "That was not exactly my meaning," said the boy dryly. "'A fico for your meaning,'" as the swan says. "Hallo, you, sir! Bully Host, clear the table, fresh tumblers--hot water--sugar--lemon, and the bottle's out! Smoke, sir?" and Mr Peacock offered me a cigar. Upon my refusal, he carefully twirled round a very uninviting specimen of some fabulous havannah--moistened it all over, as a boa-constrictor may do the ox he prepares for deglutition; bit off one end, and lighting the other from a little machine for that purpose which he drew from his pocket, he was soon absorbed in a vigorous effort (which the damp inherent in the weed long resisted) to poison the surrounding atmosphere. Therewith, the young gentleman, either from emulation or in self-defence, extracted from his own pouch a cigar-case of notable elegance, being of velvet, embroidered apparently by some fair hand, for "From Juliet" was very legibly worked thereon--selected a cigar of better appearance than that in favour with his comrade, and seemed quite as familiar with the tobacco as he had been with the brandy. "Fast, sir--fast lad that!" quoth Mr Peacock, in the short gasps which his resolute struggle with his uninviting victim alone permitted--"nothing but--(puff, puff)--your true--(suck--suck,) syl--syl--sylva--does for him. Out, by the Lord! 'the jaws of darkness have devoured it up;'" and again Mr Peacock applied to his phosphoric machine. This time patience and perseverance succeeded, and the heart of the cigar responded by a dull red spark (leaving the sides wholly untouched) to the indefatigable ardour of its wooer. This feat accomplished, Mr Peacock exclaimed triumphantly, "And now what say you, my lads, to a game at cards?--three of us--whist and a dummy?--nothing better--eh?" As he spoke, he produced from his coat-pocket a red silk handkerchief, a bunch of keys, a nightcap, a toothbrush, a piece of shaving-soap, four lumps of sugar, the remains of a bun, a razor, and a pack of cards. Selecting the last, and returning its motley accompaniments to the abyss whence they had emerged, he turned up, with a jerk of his thumb and finger, the knave of clubs, and, placing it on the top of the rest, slapped the cards emphatically on the table. "You are very good, but I don't know whist," said I. "Not know whist--not been to a play! not smoke! Then pray tell me, young man," (said he majestically, and with a frown,) "what on earth you _do_ know!" Much consternated by this direct appeal, and greatly ashamed of my ignorance of the cardinal points of erudition in Mr Peacock's estimation, I hung my head, and looked down.