Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Volume 65, No. 403, May, 1849Various
History
Blackwood's Edinburgh Magazine, Volume 65, No. 403, May, 1849
Various
England -- Periodicals; Scotland -- Periodicals
When William was eleven years old, the last phase of Eva Meredith's
existence began. Remarkably tall and strong for his age, he ceased to
need that hourly care required by early childhood: he was no longer the
infant sleeping on his mother's knees; he walked alone in the garden;
he rode on horseback with me, and accompanied me in my distant visits;
in short the bird, although wingless, left the nest. His misfortune was
in no way shocking or painful to behold. He was of exceeding beauty,
silent, unnaturally calm--his eyes expressing nothing but repose, his
mouth ignorant of a smile: he was not awkward, or disagreeable, or
importunate: it was a mind sleeping beside yours, asking no question,
making no reply. The incessant maternal care which had served to occupy
Mrs Meredith, and to divert her mind from dwelling on her sorrows,
became unnecessary, and she resumed her seat at the window, whence she
beheld the village and the church-steeple--at that same window where
she had so long wept her husband. Hope and occupation successively
failed her, and nothing was left her but to wait and watch, by day and
by night, like the lamp that ever burns beneath cathedral vaults.
But her forces were exhausted. In the midst of this grief which had
returned to its starting-point, to silence and immobility, after
having in vain essayed exertion, courage, hope, Eva Meredith fell into
a decline. In spite of all the resources of my art, I beheld her grow
weak and thin. How apply a remedy, when the sickness is of the soul?
The poor foreigner! she needed her native sun and a little happiness
to warm her; but the ray of sun and the ray of joy were alike wanting.
It was long before she perceived her danger, because she thought not
of herself; but when at last she was unable to leave her arm-chair,
she was compelled to understand. I will not describe to you all her
anguish at the thought of leaving William without a guide, without
friend or protector--of leaving him alone in the midst of strangers,
he who needed to be cherished and led by the hand like a child. Oh,
how she struggled for life! with what avidity she swallowed the
potions I prepared! how many times she tried to believe in a cure,
whilst all the time the disease progressed! Then she kept William more
at home,--she could no longer bear to lose sight of him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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