Borderland : $b a country-town chronicleFothergill, Jessie
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Borderland : $b a country-town chronicle
Fothergill, Jessie
English fiction -- 19th century
‘A fine girl!’ said he to himself, as he walked very slowly down the
avenue: he did not feel, now, in such a desperate hurry to shake the
dust of the place from his feet. ‘What a blending of fire and
softness, of vigour and gentleness! No weak-willed fool would have
spoken in that way. It was not a spiritless acquiescence in evil
because she really had no power to cope with it. It is that she
understands something of what is below the surface. She has found
out the best way to meet it. “I came here looking for joy. I have
found sorrow.” How noble she did look as she said it! Well, may she
find strength too, to carry her sorrow wisely and well. It is the
best any of us can ask for in this world.’
But he pondered the theme in every variety of aspect on his homeward
way. He wondered what she would do after he had left her—how pass
the dreary evening, alone and uncheered, in the great, desolate
house. At this idea Michael suddenly felt a wave of exceeding great
pity and compunction sweep over his soul. Well might she say, ‘I
have found sorrow.’ What else could one, nurtured as she had been,
look for, in that house and its associations? He suddenly became
conscious how very bad it was for a young woman to sit alone and
brood over troubles—bad for both mental and bodily health. And he
fell to wondering who, in all the social circles of Bradstane and
its neighbourhood could in some way play the part to her of friend
or associate.
Of course, what he pictured her as doing was entirely different from
what she really did. After he had left the room, she stood looking
at the door which had closed after him, and listened to his
footsteps for the few short moments during which it was possible to
hear them. Then, suddenly, with a quick, restless movement she began
to pace the room. Backwards and forwards she went, with an uneasy
step, for some time, till, in the gathering dark, Barlow came in
with a lamp, and with a taper lighted some candles which stood on
the mantelpiece. He soon went away again, and the illumination he
had made would have revealed her to any one who had happened to be
there, with a face pallid but excited, and a strange unusual light
in her eyes. She made a pause in her walk, moved uncertainly once or
twice, and then walked up to the mantelpiece. She was not now
thinking of the ill news and the trouble which had, as it were,
stalked into her life, but of him through whom, indirectly, she had
become acquainted with them. What did it all mean? and herself of
two days ago, where was it? Was it laughter or tears now struggling
within her—pleasure or pain? Something had happened to her, that she
felt, and she would always be different from what she had been
before. Had she been lifted up, or struck down? She could not tell,
she had not the faintest idea, but she felt Michael’s voice
thrilling again through every nerve, till at last the sensation of
the mastery he had gotten over her became almost unbearable. If he
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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