"Albany, N. Y., Special Despatch: It is reported on high authority that State Senator Grab has received a half million dollars, to be distributed among the various senators and assemblymen, for the purpose of securing their votes in exchange for certain legislative laws that will favor the Gas Trust in its iniquitous squeeze of the people for higher rates. Several senators have openly threatened to vote against these measures, claiming that Senator Grab is acting the hog and will not divide the booty fairly among them." "Fall River, Mass.: Ten thousand workingmen and women have been thrown out of employment by the mills of this city, owing to the unprecedented rise in the price of cotton, caused by the recent manipulations of that famous Wall Street speculator, Dan Bull, who by forcing up the prices in the speculative market has added millions to his own bank account during the past few weeks. The mills have been shut down indefinitely and starvation is now facing thousands of men, women and children as a consequence." "Brooklyn, N. Y.: The marriage ceremony between the Right Reverend Q. T. Getrich, Bishop of New York, and Mrs. E. Z. Money was solemnized here today with great pomp, and attended by some of the very wealthiest and most fashionable people of the country. It has been suggested by some ungodly reprobate that perhaps the young and handsome bishop married the fat and aged widow to gain possession of her millions, but this sacrilegious imputation is furiously resented by all pious church members." "Chicago, Ill.: Municipal ownership of public utilities seems to have been given a serious setback by the very costly and unsuccessful experiment this city undertook in operating its own electric and water plants during the past year. It appears that city officials are just as susceptible to the charm of money as private corporations, and just as willing, by corrupt methods, to fleece the public in order to obtain it. It is evident that as long as there is money in use there will always be boodlers." "Baltimore, Md.: The pure food inspectors of this city after having made an inspection of the different canned goods, have come to the conclusion that at least ninety per cent. of the same is adulterated and that the public is being slowly poisoned to death. The greed of the various concerns which produce these things for bigger profits, causes them to use cheap chemicals in their adulterative methods in place of higher priced and genuine substances. These inspectors make the astonishing statement that they believe all foods and drinks are more or less adulterated and that in the general rush for money profits, the inhabitants of the world are actually poisoning each other by slow degrees."