Bracebridge Hall, or The HumoristsIrving, Washington
General
Bracebridge Hall, or The Humorists
Irving, Washington
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; National characteristics, English -- Fiction
The weather certainly had its effect even upon Master Simon, for he
seemed obstinately bent upon the pensive mood. Instead of stepping
briskly along, smacking his dog-whip, whistling quaint ditties, or
telling sporting anecdotes, he leaned on my arm, and talked about the
approaching nuptials; from whence he made several digressions upon the
character of womankind, touched a little upon the tender passion, and
made sundry very excellent, though rather trite, observations upon
disappointments in love. It was evident that he had something on his
mind which he wished to impart, but felt awkward in approaching it. I
was curious to see to what this strain would lead; but was determined
not to assist him. Indeed, I mischievously pretended to turn the
conversation, and talked of his usual topics, dogs, horses, and
hunting; but he was very brief in his replies, and invariably got
back, by hook or by crook, into the sentimental vein.
At length we came to a clump of trees that overhung a whispering
brook, with a rustic bench at their feet. The trees were grievously
scored with letters and devices, which had grown out of all shape and
size by the growth of the bark; and it appeared that this grove had
served as a kind of register of the family loves from time immemorial.
Here Master Simon made a pause, pulled up a tuft of flowers, threw
them one by one into the water, and at length, turning somewhat
abruptly upon me, asked me if I had ever been in love. I confess the
question startled me a little, as I am not over-fond of making
confessions of my amorous follies; and above all, should never dream
of choosing my friend Master Simon for a confidant. He did not wait,
however, for a reply; the inquiry was merely a prelude to a confession
on his own part, and after several circumlocutions and whimsical
preambles, he fairly disburthened himself of a very tolerable story of
his having been crossed in love.
The reader will, very probably, suppose that it related to the gay
widow who jilted him not long since at Doncaster races;--no such
thing. It was about a sentimental passion that he once had for a most
beautiful young lady, who wrote poetry and played on the harp. He used
to serenade her; and, indeed, he described several tender and gallant
scenes, in which he was evidently picturing himself in his mind's eye
as some elegant hero of romance, though, unfortunately for the tale, I
only saw him as he stood before me, a dapper little old bachelor, with
a face like an apple that has dried with the bloom on it.
What were the particulars of this tender tale, I have already
forgotten; indeed, I listened to it with a heart like a very
pebble-stone, having hard work to repress a smile while Master Simon
was putting on the amorous swain, uttering every now and then a sigh,
and endeavouring to look sentimental and melancholy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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