Brave Men and Women: Their Struggles, Failures, And TriumphsFuller, Osgood E. (Osgood Eaton)
History
Brave Men and Women: Their Struggles, Failures, And Triumphs
Fuller, Osgood E. (Osgood Eaton)
Biography
Many shy people have recognized in themselves this curious and
unconscious elevation of voice. It is not so common as a loss of voice,
but it is quite as uncontrollable.
The bronchial tubes play us another trick when we are frightened; the
voice is the voice of somebody else; it has no resemblance to our own.
Ventriloquism might well study the phenomena of shyness, for the voice
becomes base that was treble, and soprano that which was contralto.
"I dislike to have Wilthorpe come to see me," said a very shy woman, "I
know my voice will squeak so." With her Wilthorpe, who for some reason
drove her into an agony of shyness, had the effect of making her talk in
a high, unnatural strain, excessively fatiguing.
The presence of one's own family, who are naturally painfully
sympathetic, has always had upon the bashful and the shy a most evil
effect.
"I can never plead a case before my father," "Nor I before my son," said
two distinguished lawyers. "If mamma is in the room, I shall never be
able to get through my part," said a young amateur actor.
But here we must pause to note another exception in the laws of shyness.
In the false perspective of the stage, shyness often disappears. The shy
man, speaking the words and assuming the character of another, often
loses his shyness. It is himself of whom he is afraid, not of Tony
Lumpkin or of Charles Surface, of Hamlet or of Claude Melnotte. Behind
their masks he can speak well; but if he at his own dinner-table essays
to speak, and mamma watches him with sympathetic eyes, and his brothers
and sisters are all listening, he fails.
"Lord Percy sees me fall."
Yet it is with our own people that we must stand or fall, live or die;
it is in our own circle that we must conquer our shyness.
Now, these reflections are not intended as an argument against sympathy
properly expressed. A reasonable and judiciously expressed sympathy with
our fellow-beings is the very highest attribute of our nature. "It
unravels secrets more surely than the highest critical faculty. Analysis
of motives that sway men and women is like the knife of the anatomist;
it works on the dead. Unite sympathy to observation, and the dead spring
to life." It is thus to the shy, in their moments of tremor, that we
should endeavor to be calmly sympathetic; not cruel, but indifferent,
unobservant.
Now, women of genius, who obtain a reflected comprehension of certain
aspects of life through sympathy, often arrive at the admirable result
of apprehending the sufferings of the shy without seeming to observe
them. Such a woman, in talking to a shy man, will not seem to see him;
she will prattle on about herself, or tell some funny anecdote of how
she was tumbled out into the snow, or how she spilled her glass of
claret at dinner, or how she got just too late to the lecture; and while
she is thus absorbed in her little improvised autobiography, the shy man
gets hold of himself, and ceases to be afraid of her. This is the secret
of tact.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account