“No,” Dr. Grabow said, just as softly, but in a tone of authority,
while his long, mild countenance wrinkled more than ever. “That is a
mistake, my dear friend, believe me. The consciousness is very clouded.
These are largely reflex motions which you see; depend upon it.” And
Thomas answered: “God grant it”--but a child could have seen from
the Frau Consul’s eyes that she was entirely conscious and realized
everything.
They took their places again. Consul Kröger came and sat bowed over his
cane at the bedside, with reddened eyelids.
The movements of the patient increased. This body, delivered over to
death, was possessed by a terrible unrest, an unspeakable craving, an
abandonment of helplessness, from head to foot. The pathetic, imploring
eyes now closed with the rustling movement of the head from side to
side, now opened with a heart-breaking expression, so wide that the
little veins of the eyeballs stood out blood-red. And she was still
conscious!
A little after three, Christian got up. “I can’t stand it any more,” he
said, and went out, limping, and supporting himself on the furniture on
his way to the door. Erica Weinschenk and Mamsell Severin had fallen
asleep to the monotonous sound of the raucous breathing, and sat rosy
with slumber on their chairs.
About four it grew much worse. They lifted the patient and wiped
the perspiration from her brow. Her breathing threatened to
stop altogether. “Let me sleep,” she managed to say. “Give me a
sleeping-draught.” Alas, they could give her nothing to make her sleep.
Suddenly she began again to reply to voices which the others could not
hear. “Yes, Jean, not much longer now.” And then, “Yes, dear Clara, I
am coming.”
The struggle began afresh. Was this a wrestling with death? Ah, no, for
it had become a wrestling with life for death, on the part of the dying
woman. “I want--,” she panted, “I want--I cannot--let me sleep! Have
mercy, gentlemen--let me sleep!”
Frau Permaneder sobbed aloud as she listened, and Thomas groaned
softly, clutching his head a moment with both hands. But the physicians
knew their duty: they were obliged, under all circumstances, to
preserve life just as long as possible; and a narcotic would have
effected an unresisting and immediate giving-up of the ghost. Doctors
were not made to bring death into the world, but to preserve life at
any cost. There was a religious and moral basis for this law, which
they had known, once, though they did not have it in mind at the
moment. So they strengthened the heart action by various devices, and
even improved the breathing by causing the patient to retch.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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