Buffalo Land: Authentic Account of the Discoveries, Adventures, and Mishaps of a Scientific and Sporting Party in the Wild WestWebb, W. E. (William Edward)
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Buffalo Land: Authentic Account of the Discoveries, Adventures, and Mishaps of a Scientific and Sporting Party in the Wild West
Webb, W. E. (William Edward)
Hunting -- West (U.S.); Paleontology -- Kansas; West (U.S.) -- Description and travel
The Professor improved the opportunity to deliver an excellent discourse
upon the wonderful evidences of God's power which geology is daily
revealing. His peroration was quite flowery, and in a strain very much
as follows:
"Science is yet in its infancy, and many things which seem dark to us
will be clear to our descendants. Future generations will doubtless
wonder at our boiler explosions, and our railroad accidents. Lightning
expresses will be used only for freight, while machines navigating the
air, at one hundred miles an hour, will carry the passengers. Steam,
electricity, and the magnetic needle have all been open to man's
appropriative genius ever since the world offered him a home, and yet
he has only just now comprehended them. The future will see instruments
boring thousands of feet into the earth in a day, and developing
measures and mysteries which the world is not now ripe for
understanding. Perhaps, the telescopes of another century may bring our
descendants face to face with the life of the heavenly bodies, and give
us glimpses of the inhabitants at their daily avocations. Who knows but
that the beings who people other worlds in the infinite ocean of space
around us, compared with which worlds our little planet is insignificant
indeed, are able, by the use of more powerful instruments than any with
which we are acquainted, to hold us in constant review? Our battles they
may look upon as we would the conflicts of ants, and they wonder,
perchance, why so quarrelsome a world is permitted to exist at all."
Next morning Sachem was up at daybreak, examining the spot where Hewgaw
and Wa-bog-aha met their fate, and underwent their iridescent
annihilation. His offering to their memory we found after breakfast,
tacked up in a prominent position beside the spring. The inscription,
evidently intended as a sort of epitaph, was written on the cover of a
cracker-box, and struck me as so peculiar that I was at the pains of
transcribing it among our notes. I give it to the reader for the
purpose, principally, of showing the unconquerable antipathies of an
alderman.
IN MEMORIAM.
Lot's wife, you remember, looked back,
(What woman could ever refrain?)
And instantly stood in her track
A pillar of salt on the plain.
If all were thus cursed for the fault,
Who peep when forbidden to look,
The feminine pillars of salt
Could never be written in book.
Hewgaw was an Indian belle
Which no one could ring--she was fickle;
Some scores of her lovers there fell
(Where she did at last) in a pickle.
Thus salt is the only thing known
Entirely certain of keeping
Flesh of our flesh, bone of our bone,
Out of the habit of peeping.
Unless the tradition has lied,
Our maiden may claim, with good reason,
That she is a well-preserved bride,
And certainly bride of a season.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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