By the Light of the Soul: A NovelFreeman, Mary Eleanor Wilkins
General
By the Light of the Soul: A Novel
Freeman, Mary Eleanor Wilkins
Fiction
"What makes me so sure? Why, everything. I know there is not another
man in the whole world for me that can possibly equal him, and
then--I feel as if my whole life were full of him. I can't seem to
remember much before he came. When I look back, it is like looking
into the dark, and I can't imagine the world being at all without
him."
"Would you be willing to be very poor, to go without pretty things if
you--married him, to live in a house like the Ramsey's on the other
side of the river, not to have enough to eat and drink and wear?"
"I would have enough to eat and drink and wear. I would have as much
as a queen if I had him," cried Evelyn. "What do you think I care
about pretty things, or even food and life itself, when it comes to
anything like this? Live in a house like the Ramsey's! I would live
in a cave. I would live on the street, and I should never know it was
not a palace. Maria, you do know that I love him, don't you?"
"Yes, I know that you think you do."
"No, say I do."
"Yes, I know you do," Maria said.
Then Evelyn lay down again, and wept quietly.
"Yes, I love him," she moaned, "but he does not love me. You don't
think he does, do you? I know you don't."
Maria said nothing. She was sure that he did not.
"No, he does not. I see you know it," Evelyn sobbed, "and all I cared
about going to the Christmas-tree and wearing my new gown was on
account of him, and I sent a beautiful book. I thought I could do
that. All the girls in the senior class gave him something, and I
have been saving up every cent, and he never gave me anything, not
even a box of candy or flowers. Do you think he gave any of the other
girls anything, Maria?"
"I don't think so."
"I can't help hoping he did not. And I don't believe it is so very
wicked, because I know that none of the other girls can possibly love
him as much as I do. But, Maria--"
"Well?"
"I do love him enough not to complain if he really loved some other
girl, and she was good, and would make him happy. I would go down on
my knees to her to love him. I would, Maria, honest." Evelyn was
almost hysterical. Maria soothed her, and evaded as well as she was
able her repeated little, piteous questions as to whether she thought
Mr. Lee could ever care for her. "I know I am pretty," Evelyn said
naively. "I really think I must be prettier than any other girl in
school. I have heard so, and I really think so myself, but being
pretty means so little when it comes to anything like this with a man
like him. He might love Addie Hemingway instead of me, so far as
looks were concerned, but I don't think Addie would make him very
happy--do you, Maria?"
"No, dear. I am quite sure he will never think of her. Now try and be
quiet and go to sleep."
"I cannot go to sleep," moaned Evelyn, but it was not very long
before she was drawing long, even breaths. Her youth had asserted
itself. Then, too, she had got certain comfort from this baring of
her soul before the soothing love of her sister.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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