"I know I am deadly dull," she said on one occasion, "but you must put
it all down to money. I don't owe a penny in the world, and you can't
_think_ how lonely I feel! I am simply rusticating for the want of
excitement. When I am in town, and the door-bell rings at
breakfast-time, I am perfectly unmoved; the postman's knock doesn't
give me a single thrill. I can walk into Véronique's without troubling
to invent a harrowing story about delayed remittances or unfortunate
speculations. I can buy what I like and pay for it ... consequently I
don't want to buy anything. And I was becoming such an excellent
diplomatist. That is the polite word, is it not, for one who fights by
subtlety and fabricates untruths? Also I am growing mean, Agnes. Do you
know, now that I have got a fat banking account, and all the world is
bowing down to me, I hesitate before I give away a shilling. I even
went in an omnibus the other day."
She laughed as she said this; she would have loved to have explained to
Mrs. Brenton that she had sought refuge in this useful conveyance to
escape from meeting Haverford whom she had caught sight of in the
distance. But she curbed the desire.
"Poor Agnes, she shivers and turns cold when she hears me say those
sort of things. She is so afraid I am going to lose everything just as
I have got it, and oh dear me, I wish I could lose him! If I had not
been in such a hurry, perhaps I should have been able to patch things
up, and have struggled on a bit longer; but now I am bound hand and
foot. His unparalleled generosity"--there was a sneer in her
thoughts--"prevents all chance of escape. If a woman lets a man settle
any amount of money on her and her children, she cannot very easily
back out and tell him that she is going to keep the money and say
'good-bye' to him."
On this same occasion Mrs. Brenton spoke for the first time on the
subject of the Lancing people.
"You have never told me what they said about your engagement."
Camilla yawned a little.
"The old man cursed me, I suppose, but he had the decency to keep the
curses off paper. Violet wrote, of course." She laughed languidly.
"Violet is always ready to hold a candle to the devil, and Horace sent
me a few kind words. Horace is not really a bad sort."
Camilla was silent a moment, and then she said--
"You know Rupert wanted to go down and interview Colonel Lancing, but I
stopped that and made him write instead. I am not sure that it would
not have been a good thing for him if he had gone; he would have heard
some nice home-truths about me, wouldn't he? It would have been a kind
of preparation for what is to come."
Agnes Brenton had taught herself already not to encourage this kind of
conversation. Like Rupert Haverford, she was very anxious indeed for
the marriage to take place, but she did not urge it openly as he did.
Where she attacked the subject was on the practical side.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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