England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
persecution, enough to drive the victim crazy; but oddly enough it did
not produce this effect. On the contrary, the sense of his constant
presence near her, watching her perpetually, became like an intoxication
to Agnes. She went about more and more like a person in a dream. To feel
that when you lift your eyes you will most probably see a handsome face
full of tender interest, anxiously waiting to secure your answering
glance, and beautiful eyes full of love and eagerness watching you
wherever you go, is not a thing which produces a very displeasing effect
upon the mind of a girl. He could not approach her directly, had not a
chance of speaking to her; but he never gave her time to forget him. The
excitement of this pursuit delighted Oswald. It would have pleased him,
even had he been much less truly touched by genuine love than he was, so
far as that love can be considered genuine which springs from the sudden
impression made by a fair face, and which has no foundation (to speak
of) of personal knowledge or intimate acquaintance. As this, however, is
what is called love by the great majority of the world, we need not
apologise for Oswald’s sentiment, which was quite real and very
engrossing. But it suited his character admirably to carry it on in this
way. He enjoyed the sensation of foiling all precautions, and conveying
by a glance, by the taking off of his hat, by his mere appearance, as
much as other men do by chapters of more practical wooing. Agnes, after
a week or two of such treatment, began to forget all her doubts, and to
feel herself floated upwards into a visionary world, a kind of poetical
paradise, in which the true knight worships and the fair lady responds
at a saintly distance, infinitely above him yet beneath him, half
angelic yet half parasitic, owing to his worship the greater part of her
grandeur. She made a little feeble resistance, now and then, saying to
herself that she did not know him, that he did not know her; asking
herself how could this interchange of glances and the dozen words they
had spoken to each other form any foundation for ‘friendship,’ which in
the trouble of her mind was what she chose to call it? But such
arguments do not count for much in the mind of a girl who feels and
knows that all her comings and goings are marked by adoring eyes, that
some instinct guides her lover across her path whenever she leaves the
shelter of her home, and that his love is great enough to encounter
perpetual fatigue and trouble, and to make him give up his entire
leisure to the chance of seeing her. If it ever gleamed across her mind
that he might have found out an easier way by making love to her
parents, and that this would at once have delivered them both from all
possibility of misunderstanding, the idea faded as quickly as it
entered, driven away by the next appearance of Oswald’s reverential
salutation, his eager glance, his apparently accidental presence. Sister
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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