"Karl Styrum."
Arno laid the letter aside, after he had read it, with a sigh. He had
found it with his other letters by the day's post upon his table after
he had left the garden-room, as we have seen, long after midnight. "He,
too!" he muttered to himself, with another sigh, and then he read the
letter for the second and third time, his face darkening as he read.
After the third perusal he sat for a long time lost in thought, and
finally took up a pen and wrote:
"My Dear Karl,--You expect congratulations from your friend; it is
indeed an ancient custom to offer kind wishes to the newly betrothed,
and I follow it all the more readily as in my case I employ no empty,
idle phrase when I wish you happiness with all my heart. We have always
agreed to be frank and true in our dealings with each other, and never
to shun entire openness through fear of giving offence. I now fulfil my
share of our compact. Indeed, after reading your letter three times I
cannot but reply to you, my only intimate friend, as my heart dictates
upon the impulse of the moment, not as I might after long and cool
consideration. Therefore this is no formal letter of congratulation,
but the true and faithful reply of a friend. Yes, I wish you all
happiness, but I do so with a heavy heart, for I know how much I lose
by your betrothal,--I, who have hitherto held the foremost place in
your regard, must content myself with the second, and I shall shortly,
as mournful experience teaches, lose this also, for love is the mortal
foe of friendship. Both cannot exist together in the same heart. Thus I
know that I have already half lost you, and shall soon lose you
entirely, for I shall never be content with the cold modicum of regard
which is all that the bridegroom and husband has for an every-day
acquaintance. This pains me profoundly. You were the only man in whom I
could thoroughly confide,--the only one to whom I could look for entire
comprehension and sympathy. Nevertheless, I wish you happiness, and my
wish is all the more fervent since I dread its non-fulfilment. Yes, my
pain in losing you is augmented by my fears for your future. I know
you, and I know that you never can content yourself as can so many
unless your marriage brings you full sympathy of heart and mind. You
are in love, and I know from sad experience that love drugs the
intellect and bewilders the judgment. You will, therefore, doubtless
regard my doubts as to your future as a positive crime against your
betrothed, but I must be frank with you, my regard for you demands it.
I repeat, I wish you joy; you need all good wishes, and if I could I
would close this letter with mine, for my head and heart are so full of
your betrothal that there is hardly room in them for another thought,
but you have made a request of me to which I must reply.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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