Adventure stories; Scotland -- History -- 18th century -- Fiction
By the end of this merchandising I was glad to leave her at the door
with all our purchases, and go for a long walk alone in which to read
myself a lecture. Here had I taken under my roof, and as good as to my
bosom, a young lass extremely beautiful, and whose innocence was her
peril. My talk with the old Dutchman, and the lies to which I was
constrained, had already given me a sense of how my conduct must appear
to others; and now, after the strong admiration I had just experienced
and the immoderacy with which I had continued my vain purchases, I
began to think of it myself as very hazarded. I bethought me, if I had
a sister indeed, whether I would so expose her; then, judging the case
too problematical, I varied my question into this, whether I would so
trust Catriona in the hands of any other Christian being; the answer to
which made my face to burn. The more cause, since I had been entrapped
and had entrapped the girl into an undue situation, that I should
behave in it with scrupulous nicety. She depended on me wholly for her
bread and shelter; in case I should alarm her delicacy, she had no
retreat. Besides I was her host and her protector; and the more
irregularly I had fallen in these positions, the less excuse for me if
I should profit by the same to forward even the most honest suit; for
with the opportunities that I enjoyed, and which no wise parent would
have suffered for a moment, even the most honest suit would be unfair.
I saw I must be extremely hold-off in my relations; and yet not too
much so neither; for if I had no right to appear at all in the
character of a suitor, I must yet appear continually, and if possible
agreeably, in that of host. It was plain I should require a great deal
of tact and conduct, perhaps more than my years afforded. But I had
rushed in where angels might have feared to tread, and there was no way
out of that position save by behaving right while I was in it. I made a
set of rules for my guidance; prayed for strength to be enabled to
observe them, and as a more human aid to the same end purchased a
study-book in law. This being all that I could think of, I relaxed from
these grave considerations; whereupon my mind bubbled at once into an
effervescency of pleasing spirits, and it was like one treading on air
that I turned homeward. As I thought that name of home, and recalled
the image of that figure awaiting me between four walls, my heart beat
upon my bosom.
My troubles began with my return. She ran to greet me with an obvious
and affecting pleasure. She was clad, besides, entirely in the new
clothes that I had bought for her; looked in them beyond expression
well; and must walk about and drop me curtseys to display them and to
be admired. I am sure I did it with an ill grace, for I thought to have
choked upon the words.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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