Changing Winds: A NovelErvine, St. John G. (St. John Greer)
General
Changing Winds: A Novel
Ervine, St. John G. (St. John Greer)
Fiction
A month after Gilbert and Ninian had left England, Henry went to London
for a couple of days on business connected with his books. Mrs. Graham
had asked him to return to Boveyhayne instead of going to Ireland, until
he was fully well again, and he had gladly accepted her invitation. He
had written a few pages of a new book that pleased him, and he was
anxious to complete the story before he entered the Army. Writing irked
him, but he could not abstain from writing ... some demon drove him to
it, forcing him to his desk when all his desire was to be out in the
lanes with Mary or sailing about the bay with Tom Yeo and Jim
Rattenbury. There were times when he loathed this labour of writing
which came between him and the pleasure of living, so that he sometimes
saw foxgloves and bluebells and primroses and violets and wild
daffodils, not as the careless beauty of a Devonshire lane, but as
picturesque material for a description in one of his chapters. And his
beastly creatures would not lie still in his study until he returned to
attend to them, but insisted on following him wherever he went,
thrusting themselves upon his notice continually, whether the time was
opportune or not. He would walk with Mary, perhaps to Hangman's Stone,
and suddenly he would hear her saying, "What are you thinking of,
Quinny?" and he would come out of his silence with a start, and say,
"Oh, my book, Mary!" and find that he had been walking by her side,
unaware of her, unaware of anything but these abominable paper people
who deluged his mind with their being ... and when they got to
Hangman's Stone, he thought always, "What a good title for a story!"
"But I can't leave it alone," he would say to himself, and then he would
compare himself to a drunkard, eager to be quit of his drink, but unable
to conquer his craving. And he had pride in it, too. That was what
distinguished him from the drunkard and the drug-taker. They had no
pride in their drunkenness or their drugged senses, but he had pride in
his books, and constantly in his mind was the desire that before he
joined the Army, he should leave another book behind him, that his life
should be expressed substantially in a number of novels, so that if he
should die in battle, he would have left something by which men might
remember him.
He had talked to Mary about his position, but she had insisted that this
was a decision he must make for himself. Her view, and the view of her
mother, was that a woman ought not to take the responsibility of urging
a man to endure the horror and danger of such a war as this. "Women
can't go into the trenches themselves," Mrs. Graham said, "and they've
no right to ask any one else to go!" That was what his father had said.
"But somebody must go, and there are people who have to be told about
things," he objected.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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