"You'll outlive an' forget," repeated the other. "I cannot, bein' as I
am. An', mind this, when you pray to Heaven, ax for gold an' diamonds,
ax for houses an' lands, ax for the fat of the airth; an' ax loud. No
harm in axin'. Awnly doan't pitch your prayers tu dirt low, for ban't
the hardness of a thing stops God. You 'm as likely or onlikely to get a
big answer as a little. See the blessin' flowin' in streams for some
folks! They do live braave an' happy, with gude health, an' gude wives,
an' money, an' the fruits of the land; they do get butivul childer, as
graws up like the corners of the temple; an' when they come to die, they
shut their eyes 'pon kind faaces an' lie in lead an' oak under polished
marble. All that be theers; an' what was his--my son's?"
"God forgot him," sobbed Chris, "an' the world forgot him--all but you
an' me."
The old woman shifted her hands wearily.
"Theer's a mort for God to bear in mind, but 't is hard, here an' there,
wheer He slips awver some lowly party an' misses a humble whisper.
Clamour if you want to be heard; doan't go with bated breath same as I
done. 'T was awnly a li'l thing I axed, an' axed it twice a day on my
knees, ever since my man died twenty-three year agone. An' often as not
thrice Sundays, so you may count up the number of times I axed if you
mind to. Awnly a li'l rubbishy thing you might have thought: just to
bring his fair share o' prosperity to Clem an' keep my bones out the
poorhouse at the end. But my bwoy 's brawk his neck by a cruel death,
an' I must wear the blue cotton."
"No, no, mother."
"Ess. Not that it looks so hard as it did. This makes it easy--" and she
put her hand on her son's forehead and left it there a moment.
Presently she continued:
"I axed Clem to turn the bee-butts at my sister's passing--Mrs.
Lezzard. But he wouldn't; an' now they'll be turned for him. Wise though
the man was, he set no store on the dark, hidden meaning of honey-bees
at times of death. Now the creatures be masterless, same as you an' me;
an' they'll knaw it; an' you'll see many an' many a-murmuring on his
graave 'fore the grass graws green theer; for they see more 'n what we
can."
She relapsed into motionless silence and, herself now wholly tearless,
watched the tears of Chris, who had sunk down on the floor between the
mother and son.
"Why for do _you_ cry an' wring your hands so hard?" she asked suddenly.
"You'm awnly a girl yet--young an' soft-cheeked wi' braave bonny eyes.
Theer'll be many a man's breast for you to comfort your head on. But me!
Think o' what's tearin' my auld heart to tatters--me, so bleared an'
ugly an' lonely. God knaws God's self couldn't bring no balm to
me--none, till I huddle under the airth arter un; but you--your wound
won't show by time the snaw comes again."
"You forget when you loved a man first if you says such a thing as
that."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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