England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Love stories
"Oh! I am sorry," she exclaimed. "I wish--I could help you," she
spoke with a child's impulsive eagerness, but it was the tender pity of
a womanly woman, that looked out of her eyes, and the look gave Rupert
a sense of having been touched with some healing balm.
Baba was no longer taking any conscious part in the conversation; the
warmth of the fire, combined with the consumption of a plentiful supply
of Mrs. Nairne's toast and cake, had induced profound drowsiness, and
the sounds of her elders' voices having acted as a final soporific, the
little maid now slept peacefully, her dimpled hand against Rupert's
neck, her golden curls upon his shoulder. The man and girl were, to
all intents and purposes, alone, and Rupert looked across at Christina,
with the smile that gave such extraordinary charm to his face.
"No wonder this small girl looks at you with rosy spectacles," he said;
"you are one of the born helpers of this world. What makes you say you
would like to help me? Do you think I need help?"
"I am sure you do," came the prompt reply; "your eyes--" she broke off,
startled by her own audacity, her glance wavering from his face to the
fire.
"Your eyes----" he repeated after her. "What do you find in my eyes
that makes you think I want help?" He spoke with the same caressing
kindliness he might have bestowed on a child; he felt an odd desire to
confide in her, as a grown-up person does sometimes feel oddly
constrained to confide in a little child, whose sympathy, whilst
lacking comprehension, is still full of comfort.
"Your eyes are so sad," she answered frankly, when he paused for her
reply; "you seem as if you were looking always for something you have
lost, something which is very precious to you."
"So I am," he replied, pillowing Baba more closely in his arms, and
leaning nearer to Christina. "I don't know by what wonderful gift you
discovered all that in my eyes--but it is true. I am looking for
something I have lost, or perhaps--something I have never had," he
added bitterly, under his breath.
"Some day--surely--you will find it?" she said gently, her heart
aching, because of the sudden hardening of his mouth and eyes.
"Find what I have never had?" he laughed, and his laugh hurt the girl
who listened. "I may find the--person who has gone out of my ken; that
is possible. I never forget to look for what I have lost, wherever I
go, and I go to many places in my car. But, even if I found the human
being I have lost, will everything be less elusive, less hopeless than
before?"
"Of course you know you are talking in riddles," Christina answered
gravely, her brows drawn together in a frown; "you don't want to let me
understand what you really mean, and that is very natural," she added
with a practical common sense that sat quaintly upon her; "but I should
have liked to help you."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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