Clerambault: The Story of an Independent Spirit During the WarRolland, Romain
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Clerambault: The Story of an Independent Spirit During the War
Rolland, Romain
World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
"It ought, at least, to be of some use,--why play into their hands?
There is no need to throw yourself into the jaws of the wolves."
"It seems to me on the contrary, that it might be very useful," said
Clerambault, "and that the wolf would find himself in the wrong box
after all; let me explain to you. This will spread our ideas, for
violence always consecrates the persecuted cause. They want to
intimidate, and so they will. Everyone will be frightened--their own
side, all the hesitaters, and timorous folk. Let them be unjust, it
will rebound on their own heads." He seemed to forget that it might
also fall on his.
They saw that he had made up his mind, and felt an increased respect
for him, but they also felt much more anxious, and this led them to
say:
"If that is the case, we will get all our friends together, and go
with you."
"No, no, what a ridiculous idea!... nothing will happen after all."
Seeing that their remonstrances were useless, Moreau made a last
attempt: "You can't keep me from coming with you," said he. "I am an
obstinate man myself, you can't get rid of me; I will wait for you, if
I have to sit on that bench outside your door all night!"
"Go and spend the night in your bed, my dear fellow," said
Clerambault, "and sleep soundly. Come with me in the morning if you
like, but it will be time lost; nothing is going to happen;--but kiss
me, all the same!" After an affectionate hug, they went towards the
door, when Gillot paused a moment: "We must look after you a little,
you know," said he, "we feel as if you were a sort of father to us."
"So I am," said Clerambault with his beaming smile; his own boy was in
his mind. He closed the door, and stood for some minutes with the lamp
in his hand in the vestibule before he realised where he was. It was
nearly midnight and he was very tired, but, instead of going into
the bedroom, he mechanically turned again towards his study;--the
apartment, the house, the street were all asleep. Almost without
seeing it, he stared vaguely at the light shining on the frame of an
engraving of Rembrandt's, The Resurrection of Lazarus, which hung on
the opposite wall.... A dear figure seemed to enter the room; ... it
came in silently, and stood beside him.
"Are you satisfied now?" he thought. "Is this what you wished?" And
Maxime answered: "Yes," then added with meaning:
"I have found it very hard to teach you, Papa."
"Yes," said Clerambault, "there is much that we can learn from our
sons." And they smiled at each other in the silence.
When Clerambault at last went to bed, his wife was sound asleep. She
was one of those people whom nothing can keep awake, who sink into
profound slumber as soon as their heads touch the pillow. But
Clerambault could not follow her example; he lay on his back with his
eyes open, staring into the darkness, all through the rest of the
night.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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