England -- Fiction; Gay men -- Fiction; Italy -- Fiction; Paranormal fiction
“Gracious me: it’s covered with writing!” said Blanche. “But quite
unintelligible. What was it about?”
“It was about Stanier,” said Colin. “Stanier is the only thing she is
conscious of. You see I’m the incarnation of it to her. And I think
she’s beginning to see that Dennis will have something to do with it.
But I really don’t believe she knows Violet by sight.”
Supper succeeded the play, and it was not till after one o’clock that
Colin went upstairs. Dennis slept in a room close to his father’s: the
door was ajar and there was a light within. Colin went in, and there was
Dennis propped on pillows and sitting up in bed, but fast asleep. His
yellow hair was tumbled over his forehead, his mouth was a little open,
shewing the white rim of his lower teeth. Clearly he had sat up in bed
in order to keep awake for his father’s coming, but his precautions had
failed: sleep heavy and soft had come upon him.
Colin stood looking at him. There, indeed, in the unguardedness of
slumber was the white paper. He looked extraordinarily young as he
slept; his was the face of a child, still sexless, just a radiant piece
of youth, holy in its innocence. Would it not be possible, without
really waking him, to put into his soul now unprotected by the guard of
its conscious self some suggestion which would, like a fruitful seed,
lie buried there and take root and presently push some folded horn of
growth above the soil?
Colin turned out the light by the switch near the door, and began to
gather force into himself. It was not an effort of concentration at all,
rather it was a complete relaxation. He had only to lie open and
tranquil, like a dew-pond, and let it flow in from the air, from the
night. Drop by drop at first, and then in ampler streams it came
flooding in, making a tingling in his blood. More and more he must
collect, attracting it with images of evil--how well he knew the process
of it--till he was charged and brimming with it, and then he would
direct it and turn it on that boyish figure that sat up in bed, not with
an effort of will, but making himself, so to speak, just the channel
through which it flowed. Throughout he must not think of himself at all,
nor even of Dennis; he was no more than the reservoir which was storing
what Dennis should receive. He must direct and convey that without quite
waking the boy.
There was a hitch somewhere, an obstruction. At first he could not
conjecture the nature of it. Then he perceived what it was. He was not
surrendering himself thoroughly, some rebellious part of his soul, ever
so faintly, was protecting Dennis’s beautiful face and slack limbs, and
standing between the boy and the force that was seething about him. It
would not allow Colin to be the channel, it blocked the way. Was it
pride in the boy as he was? Was it pity? Was it something more powerful
yet? Whatever it was, it was there.
Colin clutched at it, to wrench it away. He felt it give, and he felt
the force foam by it towards Dennis’s bed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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