The Palace reached, however—as who should say, “We’re not here to amuse ourselves”—she promptly dried her tears. “Do you know what I’m going to do?” she asked. And, on our admitting that we didn’t, she continued, blithely, “It’s an ill wind that blows no good. Theo’s absence will be very hard to bear, but I must turn it to some profitable account. I must improve the occasion to straighten out his affairs; I must put his house in order. I’m going to give Monsieur Tsargradev a taste of retributive justice. I’m going to do what Theo himself ought to have done long ago. It’s intolerable that a miscreant like Tsargradev should remain at large in a civilised country; it’s a disgrace to humanity that such a man should hold honourable office. I’m going to dismiss him and put him in prison. And I shall keep him there till a thorough investigation has been made of his official acts, and the crimes I’m perfectly certain he’s committed have been proved against him. I’m not going to be Regent for nothing. I’m going to rule.” We, her auditors, looked at each other in consternation. It was a good minute before either of us could collect himself sufficiently to speak. At last, “Oh, lady, lady, august and gracious lady,” groaned Florimond, “please be nice, and relieve our minds by confessing that you’re only saying it to tease us. Tell us you’re only joking.” “I never was more serious in my life,” she answered. “I defy you to look me in the eye and say so without laughing,” he persisted. “What is the fun of trying to frighten us?” “You needn’t be frightened. I know what I’m about,” said she. “What you’re about!” he echoed. “Oh me, oh my! You’re about to bring your house crashing round your ears. You’re about to precipitate a revolution. You’ll lose your poor unfortunate husband’s kingdom for him. You’ll—goodness only can tell what you won’t do. Your own bodily safety—your very life—will be in danger. There’ll be mobs, there’ll be rioting. Oh, lady, sweet lady, gentle lady, you mustn’t, you really mustn’t. You’d much better come and sing a song, along o’ me. Don’t meddle with politics. They’re nothing but sea, sand, and folly. Music’s the only serious thing in the world. Come—let’s too-tootle.” “It’s all very well to try to turn what I say to jest,” the Queen replied loftily, “but I assure you I mean every word of it. I’ve studied the Constitution. I know my rights. The appointment and revocation of Ministers rest absolutely with the Sovereign. It’s not a matter of law, it’s merely a matter of custom, a matter of convenience, that the Ministers should be chosen from the party that has a majority in the Soviete. Well, when it comes to the case of a ruffian like Tsargradev, custom and convenience must go by the board, in favour of right and justice. I’m going to revoke him.”