SKRUFF. Have I? Don't be too sure about that! Wheugh! I've got the most excruciating attack of pins and needles all up my leg in trying to hide this letter! (_Picks it up._) The question is, ought I to read it? Of course I ought, or how should I know what's in it. Here goes! (_Reading letter._) "Dear Harry, I can raise the one thousand pounds on our joint acceptance, for a term--but for Heaven's sake conceal this from Mr. Gritty. Yours, Teddy." Teddy!--Teddy what? Teddy who? Yes; I remember now--I've got him down somewhere! (_looking at his memorandum-book_). Here he is!--"Edward Mallingford"--he's old Gritty's other young man! Here's a bit of luck!--I've got both the young chaps in my clutches now. Ha! ha!--but stop a bit--(_reflecting_). Isn't it rather strange, if the captain was _really_ in love with Hetty, that he should give her up so quietly?--then the eagerness with which he bound me down not to cut him out with Florence. What if the money comes to _her_ after all! Luckily, I haven't quite committed myself yet--and what's more, I won't. _FLORENCE has entered from house and runs down eagerly to SKRUFF._ FLOR. (_seizing SKRUFF'S hand_). Hetty has told me all--all, Mr. Skruff. I cordially congratulate you on your conquest! (_shaking SKRUFF'S hand violently_). SKRUFF (_trying to remove his hand_). I really don't exactly understand-- (_Aside._) A clear case--they think they've hooked me. If Hetty had got the money they wouldn't be so precious polite! (_Aloud._) I'm afraid, miss, we're laboring under some little mistake! FLOR. Mistake? Not at all! Did you not propose to my sister? SKRUFF. Propose? You mean pop? Ha! ha! ha! Excuse my laughing--but it really is so very ridiculous! FLOR. Excuse me, Mr. Skruff--but your merriment is an insult. Poor Hetty! I'm afraid she'll be quite broken-hearted! SKRUFF (_aside_). Another broken-hearted one! It runs in the family! FLOR. Besides, even if Captain Taunton resigns in your favor-- SKRUFF. He _has!_ in the handsomest manner! He's even proposed to stand godfather to our first! but, says I, "No, Taunton, my boy, certainly not," says I, "I will _not_ blight your young life, Taunton, my boy," says I. FLOR. How generous of you! (_Aside._) The little hypocrite! SKRUFF (_aside_). If Hetty doesn't get the money, Florence must! That's logic, so here goes! (_Aloud._) Miss Florence, I hope you will pardon the liberty I am about to take-- FLOR. A liberty! from _you_--_you_ whom I hope I may look upon as a _friend!_ (_with pretended earnestness_). SKRUFF. _Dearest_ miss--you may! FLOR. Then I may venture to ask your advice on a matter of the most vital importance to me! SKRUFF (_aside_). Now for Teddy! If Teddy doesn't catch it hot it'll be no fault of mine! So look out for squalls, Teddy! (_Aloud._) I think I can guess the subject you are about to refer to--a certain Mr.--Mr.--(_taking a side look at his memorandum-book_)--Edward Mallingford? FLOR. Exactly!--do you know him?