American wit and humor; Caricatures and cartoons -- United States; United States -- History -- Humor
Proctor and Tecumseh were at Malden, with English and Indians, preparing
to plunder the frontier and kill some more women and children as soon as
they felt rested up. At the news of Perry's victory, Harrison decided to
go over and stir them up. Arriving at Malden, he found it deserted, and
followed the foe to the river Thames, where he charged with his Kentucky
horsemen right through the British lines and so on down the valley,
where they reformed and started back to charge on their rear, when the
whole outfit surrendered except the Indians. Proctor, however, was
mounted on a tall fox-hunter which ran away with him. He afterwards
wrote back to General Harrison that he made every effort to surrender
personally, but that circumstances prevented. He was greatly pained by
this.
The Americans now charged on the Indians, and Johnson, the commander of
the Blue Grass Dragoons, fired a shot which took Tecumseh just west of
the watch-pocket. He died, he said, tickled to death to know that he
had been shot by an American.
[Illustration: PROCTOR ON A TALL FOX-HUNTER WHICH RAN AWAY WITH HIM.]
Captain Lawrence, of the Hornet, having taken the British brig Peacock,
was given command of the Chesapeake, which he took to Boston to have
repaired. While there, he got a challenge from the Shannon. He put to
sea with half a crew, and a shot in his chest--that is, the arm-chest of
the ship--burst the whole thing open and annoyed every one on board. The
enemy boarded the Chesapeake and captured her, so Captain Lawrence, her
brave commander, breathed his last, after begging his men not to give up
the ship.
However, the victories on the Canadian border settled the war once more
for the time, and cheered the Americans very much.
The Indians in 1813 fell upon Fort Mimms and massacred the entire
garrison, men, women, and children, not because they felt a personal
antipathy towards them, but because they--the red brothers--had sold
their lands too low and their hearts were sad in their bosoms. There is
really no fun in trading with an Indian, for he is devoid of business
instincts, and reciprocity with the red brother has never been a
success.
General Jackson took some troops and attacked the red brother, killing
six hundred of him and capturing the rest of the herd. Jackson did not
want to hear the Indians speak pieces and see them smoke the pipe of
peace, but buried the dead and went home. He had very little of the
romantic complaint which now and then breaks out regarding the Indian,
but knew full well that all the Indians ever born on the face of the
earth could not compensate for the cruel and violent death of one good,
gentle, patient American mother.
Admiral Cockburn now began to pillage the coast of the Southern States
and borrow communion services from the churches of Virginia and the
Carolinas. He also murdered the sick in their beds.
Perhaps a word of apology is due the Indians after all. Possibly they
got their ideas from Cockburn.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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