Confession; Or, The Blind Heart. A Domestic StorySimms, William Gilmore
General
Confession; Or, The Blind Heart. A Domestic Story
Simms, William Gilmore
Domestic fiction
That afternoon I spent in part with the Edgertons. I went soon after my
own dinner and found the family at theirs. William Edgerton was present.
The old man insisted that I should take a seat at the table and
join them in a bottle of wine, which I did. It was a family, bearing
apparently all the elements within itself of a happiness the most
perfect and profound. Particularly an amiable family. Yet there was no
insipidity. The father has already been made known; the son should be
by this time; the mother was one of those strong-minded, simple
women, whose mind may be expressed by its most striking
characteristic--independence. She had that most obvious trait of
aristocratic breeding, a quiet, indefinable, easy dignity--a seemingly
natural quality, easy itself, that puts everybody at ease, and yet
neither in itself nor in others suffered the slightest approach to
be made to unbecoming familiarity. A sensible, gentlewoman--literally
gentle--yet so calm, so firm, you would have supposed she had never
known one emotion calculated to stir the sweet, glass-like placidity of
her deportment.
And yet, amidst all this calm placidity, with an eye looking
benevolence, and a considerateness that took note of your smallest want,
she sustained the pangs of one yearning for her firstborn; dissatisfied
and disappointed in his career, and apprehensive for his fate. The
family was no longer happy. The worm was busy in all their hearts.
They treated me kindly, but it was obvious that they were suffering. A
visible constraint chilled and baffled conversation; and I could see the
deepening anxieties which clouded the face of the mother, whenever her
eye wandered in the direction of her son. This it did, in spite, I am
convinced, of her endeavors to prevent it.
I, too, could now look in the same quarter. My feelings were less bitter
than they were, and William Edgerton shared in the change. I did not the
less believe him to have done wrong, but, in the renewed conviction
of my wife's purity, I could forgive him, and almost think he was
sufficiently punished in entertaining affections which were without
hope. Punished he was, whether by hopelessness or guilt, and punished
terribly. I could see a difference for the worse in his appearance since
I had last conferred with him. He was haggard and spiritless to the last
degree. He had few words while we sat at table, and these were spoken
only after great effort; and, regarding him now with less temper
than before, it seemed to me that his parents had not exaggerated the
estimate which they had formed of his miserable appearance. He looked
very much like one, who had abandoned himself to nightly dissipation,
and those excesses of mind and body, which sap from both the saving
and elevating substance. I did not wonder that the old man ascribed his
condition to the bottle and the gaming-table. But that I knew better,
such would most probably have been my own conclusion.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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