Historical fiction; India -- History -- 19th century -- Fiction; Thugs (Indic criminal group) -- Fiction
And where now were all my resolutions? By Alla, Sahib, I had forgotten
all--home, wife, children--I thought not of them, but I drank deeply
of love, wild, passionate, burning love, from her eyes, and I caressed
her as though she were mine own. There we sat, and though guilt was
in my soul, and it accused me of infidelity to my oft repeated vows,
I could not tear myself away from her, and I suffered her caresses
in return, though they often struck to my heart like the blows of a
sharp knife. Hours passed thus--I thought not of them; she seated at
my feet, and I with my hands entwined in her long silken hair, and
gazing at her face of such loveliness, that never had my wildest dreams
pictured anything like it. Zora was beautiful, Azima was even more so,
but Shurfun surpassed them both in as great a degree as they excelled
any of their sex I had ever seen. Fain would she have had me stay with
her: fain would she, the temptress, have then and there separated me
from my band, and led me with herself, whither she cared not, so I was
with her and she with me. Wealth, she said, she had in abundance, and
we could fly to some undiscoverable spot, where we should pass years of
bliss together, and where she would, by communication with her family,
procure such money from time to time as would enable us to live in
affluence.
"Ameer Ali," said she, "you are young, you are unknown, you have to
fight your way to fame upon a bare pittance, and for this will you risk
your precious life, when I offer you everything I possess, and swear
that I am your slave? Ah, you will not, you cannot now leave me to
perish in despair, and die of unrequited love! Speak, my soul, you will
not leave me?"
Wretch and perjured that I was, I swore to obey her wishes. Sahib, it
was a sore temptation, and it overcame me. At last I tore myself away
from her, but not till I had sworn by her head and eyes to return the
following day, when, being more calm, we might arrange our plans for
the future.
I returned to my little tent, and there, in the agony of my soul, I
rolled on the ground. I raved, I refused to eat, and was as one bereft
of sense; I spoke rudely to Peer Khan, who having been called by my
attendant came to comfort me; and I was almost on the point of driving
my dagger to my heart, to end a life, which, though a splendid prospect
was open to it, could never afterwards be aught but one of guilty
misery. But the passion reached its height; and as a thunder-cloud,
which after a burst of internal commotion, after its deep peal has gone
forth and it has ejected the lightning from its bosom, gradually pours
its pent-up flood of waters to soothe and refresh the earth, so did
mine eyes now rain tears, and they calmed me. I can now ask and take
advice, thought I, and Peer Khan, who is fondly attached to me, will
give it as he would to a brother.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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