Domestic fiction; Inheritance and succession -- Fiction; Wales -- Fiction
And then by the deed he would undoubtedly acquire Llanfeare. The
place itself was not dear to him, but there was rising in his heart
so strong a feeling of hatred against those who were oppressing him
that it seemed to him almost a duty to punish them by continued
possession of the property. In this way he could triumph over them
all. If once he could come down from Mr Cheekey's grasp alive, if he
could survive those fearful hours, he would walk forth from the court
the undoubted owner of Llanfeare. It would be as though a man should
endure some excruciating operation under the hands of a surgeon, with
the assured hope that he might enjoy perfect health afterwards for
the remainder of his life.
To destroy the will was his only chance of escape. There was nothing
else left to him, knowing, as he did, that it was impossible for him
to put an end to his own life with his own hands. These little plots
of his, which he had planned for the revelation of his secret without
the acknowledgment of guilt, had all fallen to pieces as he attempted
to execute them. He began to be aware of himself that anything that
required skill in the execution was impossible to him. But to burn
the will he was capable. He could surely take the paper from its
hiding-place and hold it down with the poker when he had thrust it
between the bars. Or, as there was no fire provided in these summer
months, he could consume it by the light of his candle when the
dead hours of the night had come upon him. He had already resolved
that, when he had done so, he would swallow the tell-tale ashes. He
believed of himself that all that would be within his power, if only
he could determine upon the doing of it.
And he thought that the deed when done would give him a new courage.
The very danger to which he would have exposed himself would make
him brave to avoid it. Having destroyed the will, and certain that
no eye had seen him, conscious that his safety depended on his own
reticence, he was sure that he would keep his secret even before Mr
Cheekey.
"I know nothing of the will," he would say; "I have neither seen it,
nor hidden it, nor found it, nor destroyed it."
Knowing what would be the consequences were he to depart from the
assertion, he would assuredly cling to it. He would be safer then,
much safer than in his present vacillating, half-innocent position.
As he was carried home in the fly, his mind was so intent upon this,
he was so anxious to resolve to bring himself to do the deed, that he
hardly knew where he was when the fly stopped at his hall door. As
he entered his house, he stared about him as though doubtful of his
whereabouts, and then, without speaking a word, made his way into the
book-room, and seated himself on his accustomed chair. The woman came
to him and asked him whether money should not be given to the driver.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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