"Aunt Patch, I never heard you speak of my father at all in that sort
of way before. You generally talk of him as if he were careless, and
worldly, and heterodox, most frivolous, and quite unregenerate. And
now quite suddenly you find out all his value. What do you want me to
do so much, Aunt Patch?"
"Don't look at me like that, child; you quite insult me. As if it
could matter to me what you do--except for your own eternal welfare.
If you think it the right thing to let your father die in a savage
land, calling vainly for you, and buried among land-crabs without a
drop of water--that is a matter for you hereafter to render your own
account of. You have tired me, Grace. I am not so young as you are;
and I have more feeling. I must lie down a little; you have so upset
me. When you have recovered your proper frame of mind, perhaps you
will kindly see that Margery has washed out the little brown teapot."
"To be sure, aunty, I am up to all her tricks. And I will just toast
you a water-biscuit, and put a morsel of salt butter on it, scarcely
so large as a little French bean. Go to sleep, aunty, for about an
hour. I am getting into a very proper frame of mind; I can never stay
very long out of it. May I go into the wood, just to think a little of
my darling father's letter?"
"Yes, Grace; but not for more than half an hour, on condition that you
speak to no one. You have made my head ache sadly. Leave your father's
letter here."
"Oh no, if you please, let me take it with me. How can I think without
it?"
Miss Patch was so sleepy that she said, "Very well; let me see it
again when you have made the tea." Whereupon Grace, having beaten up
the cushion of the good lady's only luxury, and laid her down softly,
and kissed her forehead (for fear of having made it ache), stole her
own chance for a little quiet thought, in a shelter of the woods more
soft than thought. For the summer was coming with a stride of light;
and bashful corners, full of lateness, tried to ease it off with moss.
In a nook of this kind, far from any path, and tenderly withdrawn into
its own green rest, the lonely and bewildered girl stopped suddenly,
and began to think. She drew forth the letter which had grieved her
so; and she wondered that it had not grieved her more. It was not yet
clear to her young frank mind that suspicion, like a mole, was at work
in it. To get her thoughts better, and to feel some goodness, she sat
upon a peaceful turret of new spear-grass, and spread her letter open,
and began to cry. She knew that this was not at all the proper way to
take things; and yet if any one had come, and preached to her, and
proved it all, she could have made no other answer than to cry the
more for it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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