MISS NEV. I dislike them of all things. You shan't stir.—Was ever anything so provoking? to mislay my own jewels, and force me to wear her trumpery. TONY. Don't be a fool. If she gives you the garnets, take what you can get. The jewels are your own already. I have stolen them out of her bureau, and she does not know it. Fly to your spark, he'll tell you more of the matter. Leave me to manage _her_. MISS NEV. My dear cousin! TONY. Vanish. She's here, and has missed them already. Zounds! how she fidgets, and spits about like a Catherine-wheel! _Enter_ MRS. HARDCASTLE. MRS. HARD. Confusion! thieves! robbers! We are cheated, plundered, broke open, undone. TONY. What's the matter, what's the matter, mamma? I hope nothing has happened to any of the good family! MRS. HARD. We are robbed. My bureau has been broke open, the jewels taken out, and I'm undone. TONY. Oh! is that all? Ha! ha! ha! By the laws, I never saw it better acted in my life. Ecod, I thought you was ruined in earnest; ha, ha, ha! MRS. HARD. Why, boy, I _am_ ruined in earnest. My bureau has been broke open, and all taken away. TONY. Stick to that; ha, ha, ha! stick to that; I'll bear witness, you know; call me to bear witness. MRS. HARD. I tell you, Tony, by all that's precious, the jewels are gone, and I shall be ruined for ever. TONY. Sure, I know they're gone, and I am to say so. MRS. HARD. My dearest Tony, but hear me. They're gone, I say. TONY. By the laws, mamma, you make me for to laugh; ha! ha! I know who took them well enough, ha! ha! ha! MRS. HARD. Was there ever such a blockhead, that can't tell the difference between jest and earnest? I tell you I'm not in jest, booby. TONY. That's right, that's right. You must be in a bitter passion, and then nobody will suspect either of us. I'll bear witness that they are gone. MRS. HARD. Was there ever such a cross-grained brute, that won't hear me! Can you bear witness that you're no better than a fool? Was ever poor woman so beset with fools on one hand, and thieves on the other? TONY. I can bear witness to that. MRS. HARD. Bear witness again, you blockhead you, and I'll turn you out of the room directly. My poor niece, what will become of _her_! Do you laugh, you unfeeling brute, as if you enjoyed my distress? TONY. I can bear witness to that. MRS. HARD. Do you insult me, monster? I'll teach you to vex your mother, I will. TONY. I can bear witness to that. _He runs off, she follows him._ _Enter_ MISS HARDCASTLE _and_ MAID. MISS HARD. What an unaccountable creature is that brother of mine, to send them to the house as an inn, ha! ha! I don't wonder at his impudence. MAID. But what is more, madam, the young gentlemen, as you passed by in your present dress, asked me if you were the bar-maid? He mistook you for the bar-maid, madam.