Well, having stoop'd to conquer with success, And gain'd a husband without aid from dress, Still, as a bar-maid, I could wish it too, As I have conquer'd him to conquer you: And let me say, for all your resolution, That pretty bar-maids have done execution. Our life is all a play, composed to please: "We have our exits and our entrances." The first act shows the simple country maid, Harmless and young, of everything afraid; Blushes when hired, and, with unmeaning action, "I hopes as how to give you satisfaction." Her second act displays a livelier scene,— The unblushing bar-maid of a country inn, Who whisks about the house, at market caters, Talks loud, coquets the guests, and scolds the waiters. Next the scene shifts to town, and there she soars, The chop-house toast of ogling _connoisseurs_: On 'squires and cuts she there displays her arts, And on the gridiron broils her lovers' hearts; And, as she smiles, her triumphs to complete, E'en common-councilmen forget to eat. The fourth act shows her wedded to the 'squire, And madam now begins to hold it higher; Pretends to taste, at operas cries _caro!_ And quits her Nancy Dawson for Che Faro: Doats upon dancing, and, in all her pride, Swims round the room, the Heinelle of Cheapside: Ogles and leers with artificial skill, Till, having lost in age the power to kill, She sits all night at cards, and ogles at spadille. Such through our lives the eventful history— The fifth and last act still remains for me: The bar-maid now for your protection prays, Turns female barrister, and pleads for bays. [Illustration: Publisher] WARD, LOCK & CO.'S STANDARD BOOKS. _Admirably adapted for Presentation._ =HAYDN'S DICTIONARY OF DATES.= Relating to all Ages and Nations for Universal Reference. By BENJAMIN VINCENT, Librarian of the Royal Institution of Great Britain. SEVENTEENTH EDITION, Enlarged, Corrected, and Revised. Containing 10,000 distinct Articles, and 90,000 Dates and Facts. In One thick Volume, 8vo, cloth, 18s.; half-calf, 24s.; full or tree-calf, 31s. 6d. "The most universal book of reference in a moderate compass that we know of in the English Language."—THE TIMES. _THE CHEAPEST ENCYCLOPÆDIA EVER PUBLISHED._ =BEETON'S ILLUSTRATED ENCYCLOPÆDIA OF UNIVERSAL INFORMATION.= Comprising GEOGRAPHY, HISTORY, BIOGRAPHY, SCIENCE, ART, and LITERATURE, and containing nearly 4,000 Pages, 50,000 Distinct Articles, 2,000 Engravings, and Coloured Maps. Complete in Four Vols., half-roan, price 42s.; half-calf, 63s. "We know of no book which in such small compass gives so much information."—SCOTSMAN. _THE BEST COOKERY BOOK IN THE WORLD.—373rd THOUSAND._