The tips of his fingers crackled as he touched them to his lips, then
waved them toward the unresponsive audience.
“Behind the Asterisks!” he announced his subject. “The Great-I-Am
invented the sex-impulse in order to give life to love. Necessarily He
had to make it a strong emotion in order to people His earth.
“I invented loveless lust to people Hell. None born of the flesh dares
deny his vulnerability. None but feels its basic attraction, even at
times when most repulsed. Not to its cruder phases do I invite your
attention--to the reproductive instinct of the mortal male. That is
ever awake, unashamed, engaging chiefly through its strength.
“But sleeping passion! Too few are given the dear delight of arousing
it. To breathe open the eyes searching through their mist of dreams--to
kiss into consciousness the sweet-thick lips--to feel one’s sluggish
pulse speeding to match the beat of youth’s startled heart----
“Ah, what man-brute of Earth, what god of Heaven or fiend of Hell
would not gladly give the wealth of three worlds to incite the divine
awakening!
“Moved beyond modesty, the arms uplift and cling--weak-strong arms,
made supple to curve around the bodies of babes. The lips soon learn
why they are so thick and honey-sweet, soon learn to give and to ask
back in double dole.
“The inarticulate murmur of yearnings that crave utterance, but are
ashamed of words.... The sobs of utter innocence.... The tender form
that seems to shrink even as it seeks.... At last the naked desire....
Its brief, breathless struggle to control.... The delirium of yielding
to its will....
“The hoping fear....
“The fearing hope....”
CHAPTER XVIII
The works of the old Cabot clock were worn out. During the days and
nights that followed its last tick Dolores often glanced up into its
non-committal face, reproachful that it would no longer mark off the
minutes. Time dragged, weighted by her doubt over the state of mind of
John.
Then, one night after twelve, when all the household was asleep, he
came back to her. He folded her against his heart. He took her lips. He
claimed her with full acknowledgment of his dependency.
“God forgive me,” he said. “It is too much for me.”
There was no need for him to explain. His white face, the pound of his
heart against hers, his inconsistent pleas for pardon that he might be
free to sin again, all helped her to understand. He was possessed by
the passion of an all-demanding love. He had fought a fight; had fought
and had failed.
And Dolores could not lament his defeat. Only one thing mattered, that
John’s love answered hers. She had called and he had heard. Against
his will he had come. Their acknowledgment, then, had not been a
regrettable impulse; had been, rather, what was to be. They loved, and
Heaven was in their hearts. They _loved_.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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