English fiction -- 20th century; English wit and humor; Imaginary letters; Letters in literature
“Perhaps my fears are groundless,” Herr Heine said to the Princess.
“Perhaps Bellini is not a genius after all. Besides which I have never
heard a note of his music. I purposely came in this evening after it
was all over. Is he a genius, Princess? What do you think?” Then he
addressed himself again to Bellini: “Let us hope, my dear friend, that
the world has made a mistake about you, and that you are not a genius
after all. It is a bad thing to be. It is the gift of the wicked fairy.
The good fairies have given you every other gift, the face of a cherub,
the simplicity of a child, and the digestion of an ostrich. Let us hope
the bad fairy did not come in and spoil it all by giving you genius.”
Bellini laughed, but I suspect he did not appreciate the joke.
Princess Belgiojoso said that Herr Heine had no right to talk like
that, for he was a poet himself.
“A poet, yes,” he answered, “but not a genius. That is quite a
different thing. I have never been accused of that, not even in my own
country.”
“But no man is a prophet in his own country,” said Madame Jaubert.
“I am neither a prophet in my own country nor in any one else’s,” said
Herr Heine. “My countrymen think I am frivolous, and the French think
I am German and heavy. When I am with people like you they think I am
an old professor, and when I am with professors they consider I am
a frivolous _mondain_. When I am with Conservatives I am reckoned a
Revolutionary, and by Revolutionaries I am considered a Reactionary.
And when I am among the geniuses,” he said, bowing with an ironical
smile towards Bellini, “I become a pedant, a philosopher, and an
ignoramus, almost as bad as M. Cousin.”
“I wondered,” said Madame Jaubert, “whether we should get through the
evening without an allusion to M. Cousin.”
“When I die,” said Herr Heine, “I should like a stool to be placed on
either side of my tomb, with an inscription: ‘Here lies a man who fell
from Heaven between two stools.’”
“Geniuses,” said M. de Musset....
(The end of the letter is missing)
_P.S._--Bellini died suddenly to-day, so Herr Heine’s prophecy came
true.
SMITH MAJOR
_Letter from a Private Schoolboy to a Public Schoolboy_
ST. JAMES, _March 4, 1885_.
Dear Chinee,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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