We are running along here very much as usual without anything exciting
to chronicle. You remember little Maybelle Fuller, don't you--the chorus
girl's daughter whom our doctor doesn't like? We have placed her out.
I tried to make the woman take Hattie Heaphy instead,--the quiet little
one who stole the communion cup,--but no, indeed! Maybelle's eyelashes
won the day. After all, as poor Marie says, the chief thing is to be
pretty. All else in life depends on that.
When I got home last week, after my dash to New York, I made a brief
speech to the children. I told them that I had just been seeing Aunt
Judy off on a big ship, and I am embarrassed to have to report that the
interest--at least on the part of the boys--immediately abandoned Aunt
Judy and centered upon the ship. How many tons of coal did she burn a
day? Was she long enough to reach from the carriage house to the Indian
camp? Were there any guns aboard, and if a privateer should attack her,
could she hold her own? In case of a mutiny, could the captain shoot
down anybody he chose, and wouldn't he be hanged when he got to shore?
I had ignominiously to call upon Sandy to finish my speech. I realize
that the best-equipped feminine mind in the world can't cope with the
peculiar class of questions that originate in a thirteen-year boy's
brain.
As a result of their seafaring interest, the doctor conceived the idea
of inviting seven of the oldest and most alert lads to spend the day
with him in New York and see with their own eyes an oceanliner. They
rose at five yesterday morning, caught the 7:30 train, and had the most
wonderful adventure that has happened in all their seven lives. They
visited one of the big liners (Sandy knows the Scotch engineer),
and were conducted from the bottom of the hold to the top of the
crow's-nest, and then had luncheon on board. And after luncheon they
visited the aquarium and the top of the Singer Building, and took
the subway uptown to spend an hour with the birds of America in their
habitats. Sandy with great difficulty pried them away from the
Natural History Museum in time to catch the 6:15 train. Dinner in the
dining-car. They inquired with great particularity how much it was
costing, and when they heard that it was the same, no matter how much
you ate, they drew deep breaths and settled quietly and steadily to the
task of not allowing their host to be cheated. The railroad made nothing
on that party, and all the tables around stopped eating to stare. One
traveler asked the doctor if it was a boarding school he had in charge;
so you can see how the manners and bearing of our lads have picked up.
I don't wish to boast, but no one would ever have asked such a question
concerning seven of Mrs. Lippett's youngsters. "Are they bound for a
reformatory?" would have been the natural question after observing the
table manners of her offspring.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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