“The smoke-stack is hoisted on the periscope and bellies out in the wind. In order to make it more real we build a fire in the lower opening, using cotton soaked in oil for fuel. At the same moment the conning-tower disappears under the cover, which trembles in the breeze. The oily cotton loses its honor and only stinks. There is no smoke coming from it. Every one is standing blowing with cheeks puffed out until our ‘tradelose,’ a foxy Berliner, fetches an air-pump and gets a big flame in our fake stoke-hole. With one hurrah his trick is rewarded; above the smoke-stack’s upper opening we could see a slender stream of smoke only to diminish to nothing in the next minute. We roar with laughter and again make ready to proceed with our dummy smoke-stack minus smoke. [Illustration: © _International Film Service._ The _Deutschland_ Arriving at Bremen, Having Returned from a Trans-Atlantic Voyage] “When our boatswain, Humke, comes with a jar filled with tar, the air-pump again starts to work, and at last big clouds of smoke pour out of the funnel. The effect was great. The steamer, which was at a distance, suddenly changes its course and comes straight for us. “This we had never expected. I therefore order the mast taken down and make ready for diving. Our canvas covering disappears from the conning-tower and with a deep bow the smoke-stack comes down. “As soon as the steamer sees this change in our make-up, fear fills his heart. He changes his course and flees, throwing thick, black clouds of smoke which we admire not without a feeling of jealousy. “Without hindrance we again hoist our funnel. The masts are raised. And while our steamer speeds away in her wild flight we laugh so the tears run down our cheeks. “Our fine disguise which was intended to let us pass unnoticed had instead attracted the steamer’s attention to us. He undoubtedly took us for a wreck or a ship in distress and came toward us with the kind intentions to save us. When he could suddenly see himself the target for the devilish cunning of a foxy U-boat he fled precipitately. “What did the people of the steamer think when they recovered from their scare? Maybe they felt proud to have been able to escape from the heartless ‘pirate.’ And we, who would have been so proud if our disguise had worked a little better, were preparing to sink below the surface to avoid him. “Well, we thought, ‘better luck next time,’ and we improved our invention with the result that two days later, while throwing off solid clouds of smoke, we passed by a steamer which we met without causing the least suspicion.”