Adventure stories; City and town life -- Fiction; Staffordshire (England) -- Fiction
The two directors learnt that the delicate threat had been uttered by
four _Signal_ boys who had objected to any fellow-boys offering any
paper other than the _Signal_ for sale in Crown Square or anywhere else.
Of course, it was absurd.
Still, absurd as it was, it continued. The central publishing offices
of the _Daily_ at Hanbridge, and its branch offices in the neighbouring
towns, were like military hospitals, and the truth appeared to the
directors that while the public was panting to buy copies of the
_Daily_, the sale of the _Daily_ was being prevented by means of a
scandalous conspiracy on the part of _Signal_ boys. For it must be
understood that in the Five Towns people prefer to catch their newspaper
in the street as it flies and cries. The _Signal_ had a vast army of
boys, to whom every year it gave a great fête. Indeed, the _Signal_
possessed nearly all the available boys, and assuredly all the most
pugilistic and strongest boys. Mr. Myson had obtained boys only after
persistent inquiry and demand, and such as he had found were not the
fittest, and therefore were unlikely to survive. You would have
supposed that in a district that never ceases to grumble about bad trade
and unemployment, thousands of boys would have been delighted to buy the
_Daily_ at fourpence a dozen and sell it at sixpence. But it was not
so.
On the second day the dearth of boys at the offices of the _Daily_ was
painful. There was that magnificent, enterprising newspaper waiting to
be sold, and there was the great enlightened public waiting to buy; and
scarcely any business could be done because the _Signal_ boys had
established a reign of terror over their puny and upstart rivals!
The situation was unthinkable.
Still, unthinkable as it was, it continued. Mr. Myson had thought of
everything except this. Naturally it had not occurred to him that an
immense and serious effort for the general weal was going to be blocked
by a gang of tatterdemalions.
He complained, with dignity, to the _Signal_, and was informed, with
dignity, by the _Signal_ that the _Signal_ could not be responsible for
the playful antics of its boys in the streets; that, in short, the Five
Towns was a free country. In the latter proposition Mr. Myson did not
concur.
After trouble in the persuasion of parents—astonishing how indifferent
the Five Towns’ parent was to the loss of blood by his offspring!—a case
reached the police-court. At the hearing the _Signal_ gave a solicitor
a watching brief, and that solicitor expressed the _Signal’s_ horror of
carnage. The evidence was excessively contradictory, and the
Stipendiary dismissed the summons with a good joke. The sole definite
result was that the boy whose father had ostensibly brought the summons
got his ear torn within a quarter of an hour of leaving the court. Boys
will be boys.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account