To be infused, even by bunkum and banter, with the idea of killing, is a
sad overthrow of sane balance. I would not have conceived the thing
possible to me a month back. But the monotonous desert trail, the close
companying with virile, open minds, and the strict insistence upon
individual rights--yes, and the irritation of the same faces, the same
figures, the same fare, the same labor, the same scant recreations, all
worked as poison, to depress and fret and stimulate like alternant chills
and fever.
Practice I did, if only in friendly emulation of the others, as a
pass-the-time. I improved a little in drawing easily and firing snap-shot.
The art was good to know, bad to depend upon. In the beginnings it worried
me as a sleight-of-hand, until I saw that it was the established code and
that Daniel himself looked to no other.
In fact, he pricked me on, not so much by word as by manner, which was
worse. Since that evening when, in the approving parlance of my friends, I
had "cut him out" by walking with her to the Adams fire, we had exchanged
scarcely a word; he ruffled about at his end of the train and mainly in
his own precincts, and I held myself in leash at mine, with
self-consciousness most annoying to me.
But his manner, his manner--by swagger and covert sneer and ostentatious
triumph of alleged possession emanating an unwearied challenge to my
manhood. My revolver practice, I might mark, moved him to shrugs and
flings; when he hulked by me he did so with a stare and a boastful grin,
but without other response to my attempted "Howdy?"; now and again he
assiduously cleaned his gun, sitting out where I should see even if I did
not straightway look; in this he was most faithful, with sundry
flourishes babying me by thinking to intimidate.
Withal he gave me never excuse of ending him or placating him, but shifted
upon me the burden of choosing time and spot.
Once, indeed, we near had it. That was on an early morning. He was driving
in a yoke of oxen that had strayed, and he stopped short in passing where
I was busied with gathering our mules.
"Say, Mister, I want a word with yu," he demanded.
"Well, out with it," I bade; and my heart began to thump. Possibly I
paled, I know that I blinked, the sun being in my eyes.
He laughed, and spat over his shoulder, from the saddle.
"Needn't be skeered. I ain't goin' to hurt ye. I 'laow yu expected to make
up to that woman, didn't yu, 'fore this?"
"What woman?" I encouraged; but I was wondering if my revolver was loose.
"Edna. 'Cause if yu did, 'tain't no use, Mister. Why," indulgently, "yu
couldn't marry her--yu couldn't marry her no more'n yu could kill me.
Yu're a Gentile, an' yu'd be bustin' yore own laws. But thar ain't no
Gentile laws for the Lord's an'inted; so I thought I'd tell yu I'm liable
to marry her myself. Yu've kep' away from her consider'ble; this is to
tell yu yu mought as well keep keepin' away."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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