She was standing very lancelike and straight by the slender bole of a
silver birch. A golden sun flooded richly through the greenery. Overhead
was a tunefully unflecked sky and into the shadows crept a richness of
furtively underlying color and echoes of color. It was all vivid and
beautiful and the girl standing there seemed to dominate its vividness
and its beauty. But her eyes were grave, even when a shaft of the
radiance struck her delicately blossoming cheeks and played upon the
escaping locks with which the breeze played, too.
"Do you know, I suppose in a way I ought to hate you?" she told the man,
and he swiftly demanded:
"Hate me? In heaven's name, why?"
"When a woman has been deluded into believing herself a bird of
paradise ... and has been content with her feathers, it doesn't precisely
help to discover that--" her voice grew self-contemptuous--"that after
all she has only lived the life of a Strassburg goose and has been fed
to death until she is no earthly good for anything except to be some
glutton's delicacy--"
"Strassburg geese don't search their consciences," he smiled. "They are
too busy being fed to death. If you had lost your soul I should help you
find it--thank God, you don't need my guidance."
"Yet your coming crystallized all the self-accusations that had begun to
stir in me. It made me feel my utter emptiness."
"Which only means realizing--that you might have become empty and have
not." He came close and bent upon her the eyes whose honesty was so
convincing and whose fealty was so clearly writ. In a voice that lost a
little of its steadiness he demanded tensely, "Do you hate me?"
Mary Burton stood motionless, almost rigid, but some heart-wave welled
up until she felt physically weak yet spiritually stronger than she had
ever felt. Her two hands clutched tautly at his shoulders and her eyes
gazed into his. Slowly they widened until they had unmasked all their
depths and shown what was in her heart. Then as the man's pulses leaped
to the elation of what he read there, he heard her shaken whisper
inviting him very softly, "Look at me--and answer for yourself. Do I
hate you?"
With sudden self-recovery, as he sought to take her in his arms, she
slipped aside and after a short space the same voice that had just now
been tense rippled into whimsical laughter. "No," she commanded. "It
mustn't become a habit." The laugh died and her words and pupils were
grave once more. "Why should I lie to you, dear? It's no use trying. I'm
absurdly mad about you--but I've doubted my power of really loving so
long that we must both be content to put it to the test of time. It's
too new to trust. I can't tell how much of it is my own heart and how
much is your hypnotism."
"I have come a long way," he said quietly. "I have waited a long while.
I can wait longer, if that's the edict, but not as he waits who fears
the issue. You are going to love me and marry me."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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