Christian life; Great Britain -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Young women -- Conduct of life -- Fiction
The expected letter at length arrived; and I thought myself fortunate
beyond my hopes, when I found that Mrs Murray was inclined to receive me
into her own family. My knowledge of music, particularly my skill in
playing on the harp, had recommended me as a teacher in a country which
pays for her fruitfulness in poetry by a singular sterility in the other
fine arts. Mrs Murray enquired upon what terms I would undertake the
tuition of her daughter; and seemed only fearful that my demands might
exceed her powers. After the receipt of her letter I was most eager to
depart. To terms I was utterly indifferent. All I wanted was quiet, and
an asylum which inferred no obligation to strangers. It is true, that my
hostess often assured me of the pleasure she received from my visit; but
my presence evidently occasioned such an infinity of trouble, that, if
her assurances were sincere, she must have been filled with more than
the spirit of martyrdom in my service. I was too impatient to be gone to
wait the formal arrangement of my engagement with Mrs Murray. I
instantly wrote to commit the terms of it entirely to herself; and then
took measures to obtain my immediate conveyance to Scotland.
A journey by land was too expensive to be thought of; I therefore
secured my passage in a merchant vessel. It was in vain that Dr ----
advised me to wait further instructions from his sister; in hopes
that she might suggest a more eligible mode of travelling, or at least
give me notice that she was prepared for my reception. My dislike of my
present abode, my restlessness under a sense of obligation to such a
person as Mrs ----, prevailed against his counsels. In vain did he
represent the discomforts of a voyage at such a season of the year. I
was not more habitually impatient of present evil than fearless of that
which was yet to come. In short, after a little more than a week's
residence at the parsonage, I insisted upon making my début as a sailor
in the auspicious month of February, and committing myself, at that
stormy season, to an element which as yet I knew only from description.
Dr ---- and Mr Sidney accompanied me to the vessel; and I own I began to
repent of my obstinacy, when they bade me farewell. As I saw their boat
glide from the vessel's side, and answered their parting signals, and
saw first the known features, then the forms, then the little bark
itself, fade from my sight, I wept over the rashness which had exiled me
among strangers; and coveted the humblest station cheered by the face of
friend or kinsman. The wind blowing strong and cold soon obliged me to
leave the deck; and, when I entered the close airless den in which I was
to be imprisoned with fourteen fellow-sufferers, I cordially wished
myself once more under the restraint imposed by nice arrangement and
finical decoration.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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