British -- Germany -- Fiction; Families -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction
Frau von Arnim shook her head.
"I will come again at twelve," she said, with a faint smile. "Youth
must have its sleep, and I shall be too anxious to be away long."
The door closed softly, and Nora was left to her lonely vigil. She
stood for a moment in the centre of the room, overcome by a sudden
uneasiness and fear. She had watched before, but never before had the
silence seemed so intense, the room so full of moving shadows. Except
for the reflection from the log fire and the thin ray of a shaded
night-light, the apartment was in darkness, but to Nora’s excited
imagination the darkness was alive and only the outstretched figure
beneath the canopy dead. The illusion was so strong that she crept
closer, listening with beating heart. There was no sound. For one
sickening moment it seemed as though her fear had become a reality—then
a stifled sigh broke upon the stillness. Hildegarde stirred restlessly,
and again there was silence, but no longer the same, no longer so
oppressive. Death was as yet far off, and, relieved and comforted, Nora
drew an arm-chair into the circle of firelight. From where she sat she
could observe every movement of her charge without herself changing
position, and for some time she watched anxiously, self-forgetful in the
fulfilment of her duty. But then the fascination of the glowing logs
drew her eyes away, and almost without her knowledge her thoughts
slipped their leash and escaped from the gloomy room with its atmosphere
of pain, out into the forest, back to the moment when life had broken
out into full sunshine and happiness such as she had never known, and
love incomparable, irresistible, swept down upon her and bore her with
them into a new paradise. Who shall blame her if she saw in the bright
flames not Hildegarde’s pale, suffering face, but the features of the
man who had wrought in her the great miracle which occurs once, surely,
in every woman’s life? Who shall blame her if a half-read letter and
its writer were forgotten, or, if remembered, only with a tender pity
such as all good women must feel for honest failure? And in that pity
there was mingled a certain wonder at herself that she could ever have
supposed her feeling for Robert Arnold to be love. What was the
childish regret at parting, the casual affection for an old comrade,
blown to a warmer glow by the first harsh winds of exile, compared to
this—this wonderful Thing which in an instant had revealed to her the
possibility of a union where the loneliness, conscious or unconscious,
surrounding each individual life is bridged and the barriers between
mind and mind, heart and heart, are burnt down by the flames of a pure
and noble passion? Poor Arnold! It was well for him that he could not
know what was passing in Nora’s mind nor see her face as she gazed into
the fire. He might then have wished that his letter, with its bold
self-confidence, had never been written. For the glow upon the young
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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