Golf stories, English; Golfers -- Fiction; Humorous stories, English
To the unthinking man, not acquainted with the layout of our links,
this would no doubt appear a tremendous feat. But the fact is, the
Greens Committee, with perhaps an unduly sentimental bias towards the
happy ending, have arranged a comparatively easy finish to the course.
The sixteenth is a perfectly plain hole with broad fairway and a
down-hill run; the seventeenth, a one-shot affair with no difficulties
for the man who keeps them straight; and the eighteenth, though its
up-hill run makes it deceptive to the stranger and leads the unwary
to take a mashie instead of a light iron for his second, has no real
venom in it. Even Peter Willard has occasionally come home in a canter
with a six, five, and seven, conceding himself only two eight-foot
putts. It is, I think, this mild conclusion to a tough course that
makes the refreshment-room of our club so noticeable for its sea of
happy faces. The bar every day is crowded with rejoicing men who,
forgetting the agonies of the first fifteen, are babbling of what they
did on the last three. The seventeenth, with its possibilities of
holing out a topped second, is particularly soothing.
* * * * *
Chester Meredith was not the man to top his second on any hole, so this
supreme bliss did not come his way; but he laid a beautiful mashie-shot
dead and got a three; and when with his iron he put his first well on
the green at the seventeenth and holed out for a two, life, for all his
broken heart, seemed pretty tolerable. He now had the situation well in
hand. He had only to play his usual game to get a four on the last and
lower the course record by one stroke.
It was at this supreme moment of his life that he ran into the Wrecking
Crew.
You doubtless find it difficult to understand how it came about that if
the Wrecking Crew were on the course at all he had not run into them
long before. The explanation is that, with a regard for the etiquette
of the game unusual in these miserable men, they had for once obeyed
the law that enacts that foursomes shall start at the tenth. They had
begun their dark work on the second nine, accordingly, at almost the
exact moment when Chester Meredith was driving off at the first, and
this had enabled them to keep ahead until now. When Chester came to the
eighteenth tee, they were just leaving it, moving up the fairway with
their caddies in mass formation and looking to his exasperated eye like
one of those great race-migrations of the Middle Ages. Wherever Chester
looked he seemed to see human, so to speak, figures. One was doddering
about in the long grass fifty yards from the tee, others debouched to
left and right. The course was crawling with them.
Chester sat down on the bench with a weary sigh. He knew these men.
Self-centred, remorseless, deaf to all the promptings of their better
nature, they never let any one through. There was nothing to do but
wait.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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