France -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
One Monday morning, the beginning of another week of torture, Clotilde
was very restless. A struggle seemed to be going on within her, and it
was only when she saw Pascal refuse at breakfast his share of a piece
of beef which had been left over from the day before that she at last
came to a decision. Then with a calm and resolute air, she went out
after breakfast with Martine, after quietly putting into the basket of
the latter a little package—some articles of dress which she was giving
her, she said.
When she returned two hours later she was very pale. But her large
eyes, so clear and frank, were shining. She went up to the doctor at
once and made her confession.
“I must ask your forgiveness, master, for I have just been disobeying
you, and I know that I am going to pain you greatly.”
“Why, what have you been doing?” he asked uneasily, not understanding
what she meant.
Slowly, without removing her eyes from him, she drew from her pocket an
envelope, from which she took some bank-notes. A sudden intuition
enlightened him, and he cried:
“Ah, my God! the jewels, the presents I gave you!”
And he, who was usually so good-tempered and gentle, was convulsed with
grief and anger. He seized her hands in his, crushing with almost
brutal force the fingers which held the notes.
“My God! what have you done, unhappy girl? It is my heart that you have
sold, both our hearts, that had entered into those jewels, which you
have given with them for money! The jewels which I gave you, the
souvenirs of our divinest hours, your property, yours only, how can you
wish me to take them back, to turn them to my profit? Can it be
possible—have you thought of the anguish that this would give me?”
“And you, master,” she answered gently, “do you think that I could
consent to our remaining in the unhappy situation in which we are, in
want of everything, while I had these rings and necklaces and earrings
laid away in the bottom of a drawer? Why, my whole being would rise in
protest. I should think myself a miser, a selfish wretch, if I had kept
them any longer. And, although it was a grief for me to part with
them—ah, yes, I confess it, so great a grief that I could hardly find
the courage to do it—I am certain that I have only done what I ought to
have done as an obedient and loving woman.”
And as he still grasped her hands, tears came to her eyes, and she
added in the same gentle voice and with a faint smile:
“Don’t press so hard; you hurt me.”
Then repentant and deeply moved, Pascal, too, wept.
“I am a brute to get angry in this way. You acted rightly; you could
not do otherwise. But forgive me; it was hard for me to see you despoil
yourself. Give me your hands, your poor hands, and let me kiss away the
marks of my stupid violence.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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