France -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
She did not speak again, falling back into her former state of apathy.
She did not sleep, however, her wide open eyes were fixed persistently
on Pascal’s face. For hours she sat there, motionless, erect, rigid, as
if her spirit were far away with the dead. At ten o’clock she heard a
noise; it was Martine bringing up the lamp. Toward eleven Félicité, who
was sitting watching in an armchair, seemed to grow restless, got up
and went out of the room, and came back again. From this forth there
was a continual coming and going as of impatient footsteps prowling
around the young woman, who was still awake, her large eyes fixed
motionless on Pascal. Twelve o’clock struck, and one persistent thought
alone pierced her weary brain, like a nail, and prevented sleep—why had
she obeyed him? If she had remained she would have revived him with her
youth, and he would not have died. And it was not until a little before
one that she felt this thought, too, grow confused and lose itself in a
nightmare. And she fell into a heavy sleep, worn out with grief and
fatigue.
When Martine had announced to Mme. Rougon the unexpected death of her
son Pascal, in the shock which she received there was as much of anger
as of grief. What! her dying son had not wished to see her; he had made
this servant swear not to inform her of his illness! This thought sent
the blood coursing swiftly through her veins, as if the struggle
between them, which had lasted during his whole life, was to be
continued beyond the grave. Then, when after hastily dressing herself
she had hurried to La Souleiade, the thought of the terrible envelopes,
of all the manuscripts piled up in the press, had filled her with
trembling rage. Now that Uncle Macquart and Aunt Dide were dead, she no
longer feared what she called the abomination of the Tulettes; and even
poor little Charles, in dying, had carried with him one of the most
humiliating of the blots on the family. There remained only the
envelopes, the abominable envelopes, to menace the glorious Rougon
legend which she had spent her whole life in creating, which was the
sole thought of her old age, the work to the triumph of which she had
persistently devoted the last efforts of her wily and active brain. For
long years she had watched these envelopes, never wearying, beginning
the struggle over again, when he had thought her beaten, always alert
and persistent. Ah! if she could only succeed in obtaining possession
of them and destroying them! It would be the execrable past destroyed,
effaced; it would be the glory of her family, so hardly won, at last
freed from all fear, at last shining untarnished, imposing its lie upon
history. And she saw herself traversing the three quarters of Plassans,
saluted by every one, bearing herself as proudly as a queen, mourning
nobly for the fallen Empire. So that when Martine informed her that
Clotilde had come, she quickened her steps as she approached La
Souleiade, spurred by the fear of arriving too late.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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