Let this not seem an anti-climax:—‘Oh! My guard! my old guard exclaim’d!’ exclaim’d that god of clay. Think of the Thunderer’s falling down below Carotid-artery-cutting Castlereagh! Alas, that glory should be chill’d by snow! But should we wish to warm us on our way Through Poland, there is Kosciusko’s name Might scatter fire through ice, like Hecla’s flame. From Poland they came on through Prussia Proper, And Konigsberg the capital, whose vaunt, Besides some veins of iron, lead, or copper, Has lately been the great Professor Kant. Juan, who cared not a tobacco-stopper About philosophy, pursued his jaunt To Germany, whose somewhat tardy millions Have princes who spur more than their postilions. And thence through Berlin, Dresden, and the like, Until he reach’d the castellated Rhine:— Ye glorious Gothic scenes! how much ye strike All phantasies, not even excepting mine; A grey wall, a green ruin, rusty pike, Make my soul pass the equinoctial line Between the present and past worlds, and hover Upon their airy confine, half-seas-over. But Juan posted on through Manheim, Bonn, Which Drachenfels frowns over like a spectre Of the good feudal times forever gone, On which I have not time just now to lecture. From thence he was drawn onwards to Cologne, A city which presents to the inspector Eleven thousand maidenheads of bone, The greatest number flesh hath ever known. From thence to Holland’s Hague and Helvoetsluys, That water-land of Dutchmen and of ditches, Where juniper expresses its best juice, The poor man’s sparkling substitute for riches. Senates and sages have condemn’d its use— But to deny the mob a cordial, which is Too often all the clothing, meat, or fuel, Good government has left them, seems but cruel. Here he embark’d, and with a flowing sail Went bounding for the island of the free, Towards which the impatient wind blew half a gale; High dash’d the spray, the bows dipp’d in the sea, And sea-sick passengers turn’d somewhat pale; But Juan, season’d, as he well might be, By former voyages, stood to watch the skiffs Which pass’d, or catch the first glimpse of the cliffs. At length they rose, like a white wall along The blue sea’s border; and Don Juan felt— What even young strangers feel a little strong At the first sight of Albion’s chalky belt— A kind of pride that he should be among Those haughty shopkeepers, who sternly dealt Their goods and edicts out from pole to pole, And made the very billows pay them toll. I’ve no great cause to love that spot of earth, Which holds what might have been the noblest nation; But though I owe it little but my birth, I feel a mix’d regret and veneration For its decaying fame and former worth. Seven years (the usual term of transportation) Of absence lay one’s old resentments level, When a man’s country ’s going to the devil.