England -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction
"Don't be so distressed," he heard her murmur. "It's not your fault,
dear. Don't be frightened about it."
He tried to shake her off with a childish petulance, but she persevered.
Yet she could not calm him. He broke from her and sprang to his feet,
leaving her kneeling.
"I can't face it! By God, I can't!" he cried.
"It will happen," said Grantley Imason. "If not to-night--if anything
prevents me to-night--still very soon. You'll hear of it very soon."
The young man shuddered.
"The poor little chap--the poor innocent little chap!" he muttered
hoarsely. He turned to Grantley. "For Heaven's sake, think again!"
"It's you who have to think. I have thought. I've little time for more
thought. You've all your life to think about it--all your life with that
woman, who is the mother of the child."
"Why do you torment him?" broke out Sibylla angrily.
But she rose slowly and drew away from Blake as she spoke.
Grantley shrugged his shoulders scornfully.
"The fellow has no business in an affair like this," he said. "He'd
better get back to his flirtations."
"I never thought of anything like this."
The repetition came from Blake like some dull forlorn refrain.
He put his hand to his throat and gulped with a hard dry swallow. He
looked round the room, made for a table where some whisky stood, and
took a drink of it. Then he half staggered back to his chair, and sat
down all in a heap. His limit was reached. He was crushed between the
upper and the nether stone--between Grantley's flinty pride and the
ruthless fanaticism of Sibylla's ideas. Between them they would make
him, who had wanted to be good, who had had such fine aspirations, such
high-coloured dreams, such facile emotions, so impulsive a love--between
them they would make him a murderer--a murderer in his own eyes.
Whatever hands did the deed, to the end of his days conscience would cry
out that his were red.
Sibylla sighed. Her eyes were very mournful. She spoke, as it seemed,
more to herself than to either of them.
"I wanted to make him happy, and I've made him very unhappy. I can do
it, but he can't do it. I mustn't ask it of him. He would never be
happy, I could never make him happy. Even if I could be happy, he
couldn't; it's too hard for him. I don't know what to do now."
Grantley neither spoke nor moved.
"I've no right to ask it of any man. Nobody could agree to it, nobody
could endure it. There's misery both ways now."
She went to Blake, who was sitting in the apathetic stupor which had
followed his raving outburst. Again she knelt by him and whispered to
him soothingly. At last Grantley spoke.
"It would be well if we were home before it's light and the servants
up," he said.
She looked across at him from beside Blake's knee. She looked long and
searchingly. His smile was gone; his manner and air were courteous,
however peremptory.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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