“I thought if you could stand it, other people might. I thought it was
your affair.”
“Just as if I had been a young man?”
“No! That wasn’t possible.”
She was silent. Then, “The conversation has got back into the old
quarter,” she said. “You are talking about me again. Have you heard
from your friends since they went away?”
“What friends?”
“Those you were camping with.”
“No.”
“What did _they_ say when they heard that you had found a young
doctress at Jocelyn’s? How did you break the fact to them? What jokes
did they make? You needn’t be afraid to tell me!” she cried. “Give me
Mr. Johnson’s comments.”
He looked at her in surprise that incensed her still more, and rendered
her incapable of regarding the pain with which he answered her. “I’m
afraid,” he said, “that I have done something to offend you.”
“Oh no! What could you have done?”
“Then you really mean to ask me whether I would let any one make a joke
of you in my presence?”
“Yes; why not?”
“Because it was impossible,” he answered.
“Why was it impossible?” she pursued.
“Because—I love you.”
She had been looking him defiantly in the eyes, and she could not
withdraw her gaze. For the endless moment that ensued, her breath was
taken away. Then she asked in a low, steady voice, “Did you mean to say
that?”
“No.”
“I believe you, and I forgive you. No, no!” she cried, at a
demonstration of protest from him, “don’t speak again!”
He obeyed, instantly, implicitly. With the tiller in his hand he looked
past her and guided the boat’s course. It became intolerable.
“Have I ever done anything that gave you the right to—to—say that?” she
asked, without the self-command which she might have wished to show.
“No,” he said, “you were only the most beautiful”—
“I am not beautiful! And if I were”—
“It wasn’t to be helped! I saw from the first how good and noble you
were, and”—
“This is absurd!” she exclaimed. “I am neither good nor noble; and if I
were”—
“It wouldn’t make any difference. Whatever you are, you are the one
woman in the world to me; and you always will be.”
“Mr. Libby!”
“Oh, I must speak now! You were always thinking, because you had
studied a man’s profession, that no one would think of you as a woman,
as if that could make any difference to a man that had the soul of a
man in him!”
“No, no!” she protested. “I didn’t think that. I always expected to be
considered as a woman.”
“But not as a woman to fall in love with. I understood. And that
somehow made you all the dearer to me. If you had been a girl like
other girls, I shouldn’t have cared for you.”
“Oh!”
“I didn’t mean to speak to you to-day. But sometime I did mean to
speak; because, whatever I was, I loved you; and I thought you didn’t
dislike me.”
“I did like you,” she murmured, “very much. And I respected you. But
you can’t say that I ever gave you any hope in this—this—way.” She
almost asked him if she had.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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